Facebook Statuses......

Sure, I have a social networking page. At this point, who doesn't have a Facebook page? I flit in, I flit out.... Sometimes I am a presence all the fuck over the place, and other times, I'm not around at all. Mine is a shared page with Puppy Guts. We post stuff we find amusing, interesting, funny, whatever. We post general comments and whatnot.... The very thing one does when online on a social networking thingy.

There are time when we post things and nothing happens. I mean absolutely NOTHING. Other times, I have posted things that have blown up and started something that I never would have thought would have come of just a simple post. Puppy Guts and I have posted something and literally watched as friendships fell apart over a heated debate about something that had nothing to do with the original post. And, of course, the both of us being perpetual pot stirrers, we usually will throw jet fuel onto the flames just to see what will happen. It gets pretty interesting. I find myself quite amused at how seriously some people take their pages, and themselves too. Ahh...... Who needs soap operas? There's ALWAYS something happening on Facebook!

Um.... Thanks dad?

I don't normally think my dad's "words of advice" are sound (the guy who once blew the door off the microwave trying to boil an egg in a glass of water after he told me, "I GOT THIS!"), but one thing he said is true, "NEVER trust a fart after a night of eating bowls of spicy vegetable/ beef curry stew...." The old guy hasn't come out of the bathroom since. 


On the plus side, it's rather quiet in the house today!

The brothers.....

I have three sons. The boys adore their baby sister. It's wonderful. It's great seeing them interact with her. They play and laugh and humor her and do everything that she asks (within reason). Then there's the interactions between my three boys. They will fight and argue and yell at one another. I mean, I really can't complain TOO badly. It's not like they fight and argue and yell at each other ALL the time. There are times when they get along and will play with each other and all is well in the world, but generally, those moments are pretty short lived.

I get that because they are siblings, they will fight like Spartans and Persians. It gets pretty brutal. But the one thing that I KNOW is that it is something that they are the only ones who can get away with this behavior amongst themselves. The result of an outsider engaging in similar behaviors with one of the brothers will bring down the wrath of the other two. And these days, their sister will join them.... Doom, in Fun Size. It's fun to watch.

I AM this person......

I AM this person. It's actually pretty strange listening to someone describe you to another person. I actually listened to someone describing me to someone else one time not knowing it was ME they were describing and I thought, "WOW! That person sounds SO weird!" When I realized that it was me they were describing, I had an "Oh, yeah.... That DOES sound like me...." moment and the moment passed.

I suppose my quirks and odd behaviors do make me rather awkward sometimes. It's not to say that I don't have friends or can't carry on in a social environment. That's not true at all. Most people just think I'm funny and REALLY don't get that I AM that way in real life and it isn't just some persona that I put on in a social environment. I think that's what brings me the most amusement: When someone realizes that I really AM that way all the time.....

Time to get back in the saddle....

I embarked on this thing called "stay at home mom". It was my life, my career, my everything. It's what I was called. I WAS "stay at home mom". This fall, my youngest starts off her educational career, leaving me with time during the day to go out and seek REAL gainful employment, instead of the meager scrounging from odd jobs and crap that I have been scraping by on for the last several years.

I was left to ponder about my career options.  Menial toiling at a desk? I would have burned out within a week. I don't necessarily want to have to deal with people in a retail environment either. That would probably land me in jail for assault. Sure, I suppose I could find some gainful employment working with my hands again, but the pay grade wouldn't befit my needs.

Back to basics. It's time I head back to a learning establishment and learn some useful skills that will help me to land a job that would suit my needs, keep me moving, keep me grounded, keep me on my toes, keep me interested, and wouldn't be something that would make me feel like a hamster in a wheel, doing the same thing, day in and day out.......

This is about to get REALLY interesting folks! Stay tuned!

The Single Fuck I Give......

Ahh.... The single-fuck-I-give.... It wasn't really a proud creature.... It was actually a sniveling, cowardly, malicious creature that held me back for far too long. It held me back from goals I used to have. It held me back from life. It held me back from all the things I wish I would have, could have, should have done a long time ago......

And it didn't just die. I slaughtered it. It was a grueling  battle, but I slew it and left it a bloody, messy puddle, staining the battlegrounds on which we fought. And now, having been baptized in the ichor of, really, what was my worst enemy, I became reborn....... As a sarcastic, sharp tongued, intolerant, loud mouthed, opinionated bitch, with a penchant for pointing out the stupidity of others and not being afraid of being myself. And I have to say, it is rather liberating. I don't consider myself to be a terrible wretch. I guess I have my moments where I might actually get away with being called "nice" or "sweet" or even "warm hearted" or "kind", but most people I come across aren't worthy of seeing those sides of me. Ahh, yes. The single fuck I give. It was a legend in its own mind..... And now I have become one in my own.

Veganism.....

I know that being a vegan is a choice and that it is a lifestyle. To each his own and yay great. That's YOUR thing. Not mine.

I am rather sick and tired of being told that my food choices are killing me and terrible and blah, blah, blah. Gues what? Breathing is killing me and just going about my daily life is killing me. The end result for every one of us is death. Face it. We're all going to die eventually.

It's not like I'm going to eat all unhealthy and crap and let myself go and get fat and disgusting and unfit and shit, but I am not going to completely cut out the  things that bring me a little happy either. That happens to be MY lifestyle choice, just like all those other kinds of "dietary restrictive" whatever things are lifestyle choices for whoever else. I will keep my body fit and healthy, I will eat relatively well and stuff, but at the end of the day, if it's "eat right, stay fit, die anyway", I'm going out with no regrets. Now, pass me my plate of bacon and fries dammit!

My shortness....

I'm short. there's no polite way to put it. I measure in at a whopping 5'2" on a low gravity day, after stretching. Short. I don't think I even come close to "average" as far as height for women. I fall somewhere in the "dwarfish" range. I am usually the shortest person in a room (unless I'm volunteering at the elementary school AND it's fourth graders or younger....) and I'm usually having to walk around on my tiptoes in order to see things because, well, I can't see over other things. I can shop in the kids' department for clothes and generally, I can get away with sneaking by things and people because of my diminutive stature.

The way I figure it though, I don't think the world could handle the awesomeness of a bigger sized me. I'm short because anything more would just be too much. Yes, I live with the fear of becoming just a little bit TOO awesome and because of it, the world ends and everyone and everything dies.

Farts happen.....

I dont' get the people who get all squeamish around their "significant others" over certain bodily functions and stuff like that. Closing doors when it's just the two of them to go make potty. They will go into a different room to blow their nose or fart or something. They can't be in the bathroom at the same time while ones shaves something and the other brushes their teeth. They can share in naked sexy time, but everything else is off limits? I'm also betting dollars to doughnuts that these are also the same kind of people who have sex with the lights out or at the very least, under a sheet or blanket or something.....

I've never really quite understood it though. I mean, it's obvious that everyone poops, everyone pees, everyone burps, farts, has to blow their nose, grooms themselves, etc. and yet, two people who are supposed to be sharing intimacies feel the need to put up barriers. Things they don't discuss. Things they don't talk about. Things they don't do in front of one another. And all because....

My belief is that there shouldn't BE any barriers of any variety. I mean honestly. Isn't that what true "unconditional love" is supposed to be about? Compatibility to the point where nothing else matters and that EVERY aspect and EVERYTHING between two people are completely shared. I don't know. Just a something rattling around in my head as I type this from the potty as Puppy Guts shaves......

MY sleepies....

It's no secret that I am not necessarily a morning person and that I like my sleep. But necessities and all, I use the early mornings to get some stuff done before the hustle and bustle of life with four children. I am not pleasant to be around early in the morning without a cup of coffee in my hand (I'm not coherent until about the second cup). It's probably a good thing that I sometimes get up when everyone else is still asleep because of the fact that I am not pleasant to be around.

What can I say. I'm not really a morning person. I'm not really a night owl either. I can rock 11:15 AM like a champ though. But that's really about it. Fuck mornings. Need coffee.

Sascrotch.....

Being Asian, I'm not as hairy as your average bear. Don't get me wrong, there is "maintenance" involved. If I REALLY let it go, I might look like a yeti with severe alopecia. But that's about the extent of it.

Then there are the women who just don't care any more. Ugh...... And to top it off, they wear the skimpiest of bathing suits and BLECH! I have been known to say things like, "Hey! Sascrotch! Please put your robe back on and go somewhere else because EW!"

You may be asking, "Why the hell would you be looking??!?!!?" Well, to answer your question, it's kind of difficult NOT to notice when your young child is asking if she could pet a lady's poodle that was sitting in her lap. (NOT a joke. This actually happened.....) I don't think I could have run away fast enough. It was bad.
Ladies, please do the courtesy of doing some maintenance before going into public in a bathing suit. Ew. Thank you.

Random A.D.D. moment.....

I never really know when my "moments" are going to hit. It's usually a combination of things that leads to my really bad fits of A.D.D. and when they are bad, they're pretty bad. Sometimes, it's overabundance of caffeine, lack of sleep, too much to do, too many distractions, too loud, too quiet, too bright, to dark. Maybe I have a lot on my mind, or too little. But when I have my A.D.D. moments, I REALLY have them.

Some find watching me in my moments to be amusing and a source of pure entertainment. They are usually the ones who don't understand what it's like to live with my brain. It's okay though. It's rather hard to explain, considering I've been this way all my life, to someone who is so boring and narrow minded and lives so far in the box that they cannot picture anything other than the tiny little world they live in. Mine is a vast, endless, technicolored universe and sometimes, I get transmissions from everywhere, all at once. That's really the only way I know how to describe it.

Bacon farts.

Yes, I swear.... A LOT.

I realize that maybe perhaps, my use of "foul language" might be a little excessive at time. I will submit that there are time when it is TOTALLY justified and when a situation happens to be a true "FUCK!" situation, you KNOW I am going to use the fuck out of the fucking "FUCK" word. When I mean it, I will spew profanities like an expert. The graphic contents and description of where I will tell an individual to go and what they can do when they get there has been known to make grown men cry. The pure mastery of the way I can sling every curse word around, (some I have been known to make up on the fly, but my meaning was ALWAYS clear) has made people cringe or cry or even (well, this one time) throw up the contents of their guts. (An AWESOME sight, I must say. The sheer volume alone was pretty impressive.) My use of "sentence enhancers" has made madmen sane, and sinners of saints, and has tested the patience of even the most steady of people. AM i going to stop? Probably not.

Never mind....

I can't always say that my days are always productive. Shut up. At least I'm honest about it. I may have the very best of intentions about the things that I want to get done. I'll make lists of what, when, how and blah.... I'll get started and something happens. The motivation leaves or something.... I dont' know. Then I'm left sitting there staring at my well intentioned lists, and that will be about as productive my day is going to be. Yeah.... I have a feeling this is going to be one of those days...... Shit.

Pfft! Don't care.....

I don't get why people feel the need to make me have to believe the importance of their feelings/ beliefs/ causes/ or whatever when I have made it perfectly clear that I really don't give a shit either way. You know the type. They crave the attention a little too much. They whine and cry and bitch and complain about everything and they try so hard to get others' attentions by laying on some sob story or something and try and get people to give a shit about their sad stupid shit, when it's obvious that everyone else has their own pile of shit they need to deal with.

I used to try and be polite and smile and nod and say how sorry I was, even though on the inside I was screaming at them to shut the fuck up, having punched them in the face multiple times in my minds eye. But those days are gone. Now a days, I will let a person know from the get go that I really don't give a shit. It saves on a whole bunch of time and nerves and potential aneurisms. It ends well for all those involved.... Well, maybe not he one seeking out attention, but then, I really didn't give a shit anyway, so, I guess it really IS a win win!

Homemade with love.....

I don't bake too often. I mean, I enjoy cooking and stuff and always make my children's meals "from scratch". (Well, MOST of the time....) I like coming up with different concoction in the kitchen and I always have a great time. Trying out new recipes, slapping together old ones. Whatever. In short, I do like to cook. And whether it's that I'm making "something from the box", which doesn't happen all that often, or I'm making something from fresh ingredients, I like sending Puppy Guts into to work with a hot meal from home. The catch? It's all homemade. It's just that I more than likely licked the spoon and kept right on going, using the same damn utensile.

My ringtone.....

I have a pretty catchy ringtone. It came with the phone. I didn't buy one or whatever because I wouldn't know how to do that shit anyway. I tried to find one that wasn't annoying or would get annoying, unless it's the one I have for my parents, and although I do have special ringtones for my Puppy Guts and my bestie, I wanted to make sure that my general ringtone was one that I could live with for quite a while. But it turns out, it may be a little too catchy because I like listening to it and doing a little dance to it sometimes.... Quirk... I know.....

The excuse....

I know that I am VERY guilty of needing to take my own health, fitness and wellbeing a little more seriously and that I should REALLY start putting a more concerted effort into them, especially now that I am, let's face it, getting older. And I will admit, sometimes I will make excuses for why I'm NOT eating healthy sometimes or why I'm NOT working out one day. Yuppers. Guilty. I've done it, I'll probably do it again and I will more than likely continue to make an excuse or two on the days when I just don't wanna.

On the other side of that, it's not as if though I have or will let myself go completely and just stop caring all together. It's not as if though my whole entire life is just a bunch of excuses strung together with a bunch of self told lies, sprinkled with dessert cakes, McDonald's and instant food. It's not as if though I have gotten to the point where excuses aren't going to do it and that these excuses are going to mean too much of anything anymore. Don't get me wrong.... I don't have the same build as I did in my twenties. It takes a bit more effort on my part to maintain a healthy physique and it really does take a toll on me when I end up eating something that is less than healthful and I skip out on a workout or two these days.

I know I rag on fat people and go on tirades about them, but the fact of the matter is, they let themselves become that way. A little bit of self discipline and self respect and there really wouldn't be a problem for 99% of the overweight people. I'm tired of hearing that it's a glandular condition from every fat person I come across. No it's not. It's a self control issue. It is about controlling your diet. It is about getting off your ass and doing something about it. It is about proper diet and exercise. It is about what you do and what you put into your fat gobs.

I really don't understand how a person can get to that point. I mean, especially those who are morbidly obese. Eventually, no matter how gradual the weight gain, it does become plainly obvious that one needs to lose weight. I mean it should..... It gets to a point where it is no longer just a disease of the body, but a disease of the mind as well. You can't honestly tell me that these people look in the mirror and think they look alright.....

Well, I know that it fuels me all the more to try and keep fit and healthy. At least I know that when the zombie apocalypse comes, the zombies will eat all the fatties first, and will end up becoming too sluggish to run too fast.

Control? Sounds more like "tyranny".....

Okay.... I've been tossing around whether or not I was going to touch on this subject, but today, I'm gonna touch on it a lot. Seriously. Because, I'm getting more pissed off about all of this as the days pass.

What the fuck am I talking about? Gun control. This is where I'm going today. If you find the topic offensive, then might I suggest you go away and come back on a different day. Oh, and to let you know, I am for keeping the private sector armed and their names NOT be made public. The whole "leave me and my guns alone" side of the argument, so..... Make your decision now as to whether you want to stay and listen to me rant about this..... GO ahead. It's okay. I understand. (Not really..... I mean, it's our RIGHT as AMERICANS to be able to arm and protect ourselves and our families, but if it's that your fears are keeping you from seeing that and your fears that are wanting for the government to disarm ALL of us because of your fears, well, I'd much rather you go fuck off now. Since when has it been okay for anyone to infringe on MY constitutional rights anyway? Don't fucking judge me because you're a moron. Go be stupid somewhere else. Thank you.)

Well, seeing as how you're still here and reading along, it's either because you want to "listen" to what I have to say to agree with me, to learn something, or to mock and laugh. Whatever. It boils down to this. Disarming the private sector? HUGE mistake. I'm not talking for the "people in charge" or for the sake of safety for everyone. I am talking about Hitler/ Pol Pot type bad idea. They disarmed the private sectors before they took tyrannical holds over everyone and everything....

Well, let's break this all down and touch on some stuff here. Alright. The argument that when our forefathers wrote up the Constitution, the technology that we have now, wasn't even imagined then. But times DO change and as we move forward, those inalienable rights are stil inalienable. By what is written, the second amendment is really more about our right to be able to protect ourselves, our rights, our freedoms as Americans. And as far as the word "militia', which is where a lot of people get hung up, well, gosh darn skippy, every American is part of the country's "militia". If something were to happen, and, by chance, there were no "military branches" any more or something, and we all got called to stand up and fight, guess what? Grab your torches and pitchforks people!

Just because we were to "get rid of the guns", or make guns illegal and stuff for the private sector, does that really make them "disappear" all together? Creating more "gun free zone"s is not going to make a person hell bent on hurting/ killing people stop and think, "Oh.... Gun free..... I guess I can't go on my killing spree here...." Nope...... It creates those "killing boxes". Like shooting fish in a barrel. Bad guys are always going to be bad guys. Take away the right to bear arms from your every day average "good guy", and there is more of a chance that the bad guys are going to cause more harm.

Disarm everyone and it's just going to create more creative criminals with crazier ideas. I mean, think about all of the mass shootings that we DO hear about. They are all unarmed people, stuck inside a killing box (created by mindless and fearful sheep / "the management"), and the media and government are blaming the guns for all of those deaths and injuries. Huh? Since when did we start blaming an inanimate object / a tool for the destruction of people's lives? So, what we are being told is that we shouldn't blame the person pulling the trigger. It's not their fault. It was mental instability, therefore the pharmaceutical companies and the fact that access to weapons is simple and easy, even though it's not, therefore, we shouldn't have them be so readily available.... Sounds like mental masterbation and absolute retarded fucktardery to me. No wonder we see so many people who WON'T take responsibility for any of their actions or words. This is what our country has become. Point the finger and blame someone else. Great.

I mean, imagine for a moment that we could POOF! make all the guns in the world disappear. Right off the top of my head, I could come up with a whole mess of different ways a sick individual would be able to kill a whole bunch of people without shooting them. Then what? Are we supposed to start banning everything? It will come to a point where we aren't allowed to do anything and we would all be armless, legless, toothless, sitting in a cart, because any potential method of killing other individuals will end up needing to be banned and stripped from us. Sounds ridiculous? Pfft.....

And while the gun ban issues are being pushed forward, as we hear about how guns are killing people, there are those of us who won't just listen and agree. We like to think for ourselves. So, as one of those, I'd like to ask, WHY THE FUCK IS IT  THAT WE WON'T EVER HEAR ABOUT THE ARMED PRIVATE CITIZENS WHO SAVED COUNTLESS LIVES BECAUSE THEY HAPPENED TO BE OUT AND ABOUT WHEN OTHER MASS SHOOTINGS TOOK PLACE??????? You don't get to hear about as many of those in the news. We should, but we don't.

Why? You may be asking yourselves. I mean, if you saw both sides of the argument, you'd be able to make an informed decision about what's best for you, your family, your lives and how our government should be run, right? Yup. THAT IS the point. These are all decisions that are being made FOR US. It's just being spoon fed to the sheep in small doses sprinkled with candy and sugar and antifreeze, to make it all palatable and kill off their brain cells a little at a time. That way, when our country IS completely taken over by a communist regime and everything goes to shit, the soft headed masses can only be left wondering what happened, and be powerless to do anything about it.

It starts with taking away power from the people. I mean, remember that our elected officials are supposed to be working FOR US? How's that working out for you? They live extravagant lives on our dimes. (Let me tell you, if they were working for minimum wage, we'd SURELY see a change in "the system" might quick.....) Yup... These so called "elected officials" are supposed to be working FOR US. What other job can a "hired employee" get paid more money than "the boss", treat the hirer like shit and get away with lying, stealing and cheating as much as politicians do?

So what's going on? Well, we're slowly being stripped away of everything that America is supposed to be for Americans. "Undocumented aliens" are given as much rights and freedoms as REAL citizens, if not more, and our civil liberties are being taken away, the enumerated rights, outlined by our forefathers, worded to stand the test of time as we continue to move forward, are being yanked away. And the only things that the petty small minded morons are doing is starting little civil spats amongst themselves when the fight REALLY should be taken to those "employees" who are supposed to be working for US and give them an all American smack down. But no. I guess it's much more important to keep having to listen to the propaganda and watch as the mindless sheeple buy into the bullshit that they hear every day and spew to those of us who won't bow down, the stuff they hear, verbatim.

All I have to say is, when the shit hits the fan, and I am able to protect me and mine, don't come knockin' on MY door, begging and pleading for help. It was YOUR responsibility to make sure that you took advantage of your civil liberties to do everything you could to ensure the safety of you and yours. It's not to say that I have a blanket protection from anything and everything me or my family will come across in life, but at least I have peace of mind knowing that I have some control over violence coming to my door.  Well, more control than someone who's only option is dialing 9-1-1.

More sleepies.....

There are plenty of days when I just don't wanna. The alarm sounds and the last thing I want to do is open my eyes, roll out of the comfort of my nice, warm bed and get started with my day. I just want to stay in bed and sleep and roll around in bed and sleep some more. That's it. And generally, when the mornings start off that way, the day doesn't really get any better. The only thing that I end up really looking forward to is crawling my carcass back into the bed and going back to sleep.

So I go about my day, counting down the minutes, I trudge around, get things done, do what I have to do, mostly sussing out my day in a state of "autopilot" waiting for the moment that my head hits the pillow, as I settle in for another night of sleep.

And then come the moment when all is said and done, and all the "i"s of the day are dotted, and all of the "t"s of things that needed to get done are crossed. Shower time, jammie time, teeth brushy time, yay happy goodness and I crawl under the covers and my head hits the pillow then...... FLABAMMO! Insomnia. Woohoo!

It's MAGIC!

I do my best to try and answer all the questions that my kids come to me with. I think it's SO important that they A.) expand their own knowledge with information regardless of whether it's trivial or not, B.) they can come to me about anything because they know that I will do my best to help them out and C.) in the chance that I don't know the answer to something, they know that no one person knows everything, but because we have a wide and vast source of information, we can look that shit up and learn something together, which is a pretty cool experience.

There are time, I will admit, that I may or may not have the answer to something and I an just too done to muster up the energy to adequately answer a question. Maybe it's something like, "Mommy? If I grew up in your tummy as a baby, how did I get out of your tummy?"

The answer? "Magic!"

Warning: This only work on the younger children..... Any child older than 4 will look at you like you're a retard and will walk away muttering to themselves about what a dork and a doofus you are.

Happy Birthday, Squish!

My dearest little Miss Kitten Mittens! What a big girl you are today, as you turn five years old. Soon, you will be going off to big girl school for real! You have brought so much joy into my life. I love that you can be a pink and sparkles loving princess, but still be a kickass little brute as well. Never lose that fighting spirit, little one! It's hard to believe that you're five years old!

I can't wait to get started on those pink frosted cupcakes with the "zombie parts" sprinkles! And Nerf dart gun wars with your brothers will be quite a hoot too. I love you to squishy little pieces my little one. Never let anyone determine who or what you are and keep following the beat of your OWN drummer and grow to be the best little Squish  that you can! Hugs and kisses to you on your special day Miss Baby Doll! I hope you're ready to kick some ass! I love you always!

The more things stay the same......

My parents always hoped that the things they saw in me as "flaws" would change over time and that they were just phases that I was going through. My parents always hoped that I would become something that I'm not. My parents always hoped that I would follow in their footsteps and become people just like them. My parents always hoped that everything that I was, was just a phase I would grow out of. They hoped that I wouldn't continue to be their greatest disappointment, their greatest mistake, their greatest shame, their greatest failure in life.

Well, sorry to disappoint yet again, parental units. It turns out that despite the many years of you trying to mold me, scold me, punish me and subject me to physical reprimands and what I feel to be nothing short of mental abuse, I turned out to be the exact opposite of what you had hoped for and I remained your greatest disappointment, your greatest mistake, your greatest shame, your greatest failure in life. A fact that they remind me of at every opportunity they have. What bugs them most of all is that although it used to bother me when they told me so, it no longer carries any weight with me. It no longer upsets me, and it brings me some joy and makes me smile and giggle, which in turn bugs the ever loving shit out of them, which in turn brings me quite a bit of amusement.

I've never hidden the fact that my parents and I are part of a dysfunctional family. Honestly. Mine is the perfect fodder for a comedy/ satire show about the epitome of "dysfunctional family". Between a cultural barrier, and a language barrier, anad just an all around disrespect of one another all around because I think they're a couple of assholes and they think I should respect them anyway. Pfft.... Ain't happening. I've finally gotten it to the point where they go about their business, and I go about mine. 10 word exchange per day maximum. Perfect.

Nuh-uh! Yeah-huh!

The most simple, yet complicated "debates" between two people is when they are on EXACT polar opposite sides. Like the toilet paper debate (over or under), it's cold in the house/ no it's not, windows opened/ windows closed, yes, it is/ no, it's not, etc. These types of debates REALLY get interesting, ESPECIALLY when the two people engaged in said debate are equally tenacious, stubborn, opinionated, reasonably intelligent enough to form coherent and logical arguments as to why they believe themselves to be correct in their assumptions.

I can respect those types. I understand those type of people. I get them. You can tell they would be very interesting to have a civilized and normal conversation with. It would be "intelligent" and there would be a back and forth, of which the subject matter may or may not necessarily be intellectually stimulating, but nonetheless, It would be a form of civilized conversation. VERY unlike the , "Because I said so..." type arguers whom I abhor and find to be stupid and pedantic.

Just sayin'....... Ass hats. Grow the fuck up or just shut the fuck up.

Me? Childish?

I don't really see myself as "childish". Maybe a tad immature at times. And perhaps my mockery of people and other such "less than appropriate" behavior, especially out in public might seem a little "off", but, "childish"? Who decided that what I am and what I do is considered "childish" anyway? I certainly didn't have any say in the matter, nor was I given the opportunity to voice my opinions on the matter, which I think is TOTALLY unfair and really really REALLY very icky.

Bah.... Regardless. It's not as if I'm gonna change it anyway, but it'd be nice if "they" would check with me before making any such big decisions like this from here on out, that'd be great. Just letting this be known. Thanks for your kind attention.

MINE!!!! MY FOOD!!!!!

It's not that I have a problem sharing my food..... Well, yes I do, but sometimes I'll let someone have a bite of something that I happen to be eating. Maybe.

I spend a lot of time in front of the refrigerator, with the door open and my head inside of it, looking around and mentally assessing what's there and stuff and placing dibs on what's MINE or what is GOING to be mine. The same can be said for the food cabinets. Then I also have my own secret stash of noms that NO ONE knows about, but that's besides the point.

Now, everyone knows about my obsession with bacon. I will normally cook up a package or two at a time, carefully wrap them in paper towel then into a ziplock baggie and hidden in the back of the fridge so that I ALWAYS have a steady supply. And if in the case that I get hit with a serious bacon craving and don't feel like waiting forever while the bacon cooks, which is, like, always. Bacon. On hand, all the time. It's MY FUCKING BACON!

And when it's gone and NOT because I ate it....... Grr........

Just keep going.....

Some of the best advice I ever got was from my dog. Well, sort of....

As he aged, he became feeble and clumsy. Blindness and deafness didn't help him much either. But he kept chugging along. I mean, in the end, he lost his battle, but he lived a noble life and died a noble death. He went until he just couldn't any more. And honestly? At twenty years old, he didn't owe any one of us any favors anyway. I mean, in human years, that would have made him well over a hundred years old. But he never gave up. He gave a great fight until the fight was all spent up. He didn't give up any of it at all. Everything he did, he did to the fullest. Granted, the last ten years, the things he did were eat, sleep, make potty and fart. But regardless, he did them all very well and he enjoyed the fuck out of doing them. Sometimes, he fell off his bed when he was sleeping. Sometimes, he'd end up peeing on himself or stepping in the healthy pile of the shit he took. Sometimes, his gas offended even him and he would have to relocate from his favorite comfy spot to go find another. Sometimes, he didn't get as many nommy treats as he would have wanted. But he kept moving right along. A serious back injury didn't stop him either. Blindness, deafness, old age, arthritis. All came with harsh effects, but none stopped him. He just kept right on going.

I think it's a rather important thing that I should take something from watching him all these many years.  When I say"he didn't give up anything" he really didn't. In his end, he even gave us an incredible rally that I really believe to be nothing short of miraculous. It was a short lived rally, but Otis made sure that every last bit of what was keeping him going was spent up to the last drop. And when he went, it was when he had nothing more to give back. That was it. It was all used up and completely spent. And that, to me, is the way I'd like to be and the way I'd like to go out, despite all the obstacles that I have to face or whatever. But just remembering to keeping driving forward and not lose the fight in me.

Otis has been gone for two months and three days now. I still think about him quite often. His blanket and pillow are still set up on the floor by my bed. It's the last of his things, but I just haven't the heart to put them away quite yet. It's strange how, sometimes, late at night, when I'm feeling a little low and can't sleep, I can hear the distinct sound of the tags on his collar, like he was shifting his position on his pillow. Him letting me know that he comes around to check up on me and that in some way, he's still here with me, making sure that I didn't forget any of the lessons he had taught me over the years.

Thanks buddy. I needed that. I'm good now. You rock!

That guy in office there.......

I don't think it's any secret how I feel about our president and the shit storm he continues to bring with him. I mean, I think we can agree that he is nothing more than a socialist muslim, hell bent on destroying the U.S. because he hates our country, right? I won't even get into his questionable heritage..... And it's really no secret about how I feel our country (because I am a patriot), our government and our fellow Americans are being abused and run into the ground. Benghazi, Fast and Furious, illegals being referred to as "undocumented" as they take away from DOCUMENTED AMERICANS, money, jobs, homes, food and the rights and freedoms they should have as Americans, taxes, gas, rising prices of everything, nothing getting resolved as more problems arise, dirty political this and scandal that. The government who should be working FOR US are now considering US as unable to care for ourselves and therefor, this same government that should be working FOR us is making our decisions, lying to us saying that they are creating a better word for us, all while they run our country into the ground. Scary thing is, we, the people, are allowing this to happen. I would REALLY like to know what has gotten better since the whole hope-y change-y thing took hold. And I am NOT going to hear that it was Bush's fault any more. Seriously. It's getting pretty old. And to top it all off, we are being told that we "have to be tolerant" of un-American peoples poisoning out great country. Great....

I mean, it's not like a major overhaul would have taken place had the current asshole in charge hadn't taken the throne, but honestly? I don't think I'd be upset if he and his family disappeared to parts unknown and never came back EVER. I am NOT a political person by any stretch of the imagination. Seriously. But I have my opinions. I don't know that I would have been happy either way, but I would have been less unhappy with the other guy WAY more. I mean, we've had Barry back only a couple of months and HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHITBALLS! Things are more fucked up than EVER! He's basically raping our Bill of Rights, and taxes? Pfft! "Undocumented" citizens? Obama phones? Free stuff for those unwilling to do ANYTHING for themselves?  Groceries, gas, EVERYTHING! FUCK!  All while the Bama's travel to another exotic location for yet another family vacation, ON OUR DIME,  so that Bar can go play golf and Michelle can go out shopping for expensive crap that most of us couldn't even think about with going broke. "We're all going to have to tighten out belts..." I can see that you and your family are suffering along with the rest of us Mr. President...... Asshole.

For all you optimists who believe things are gonna get better: Wake the fuck up and take off your rose colored glasses you stupid fucks! We are in for a VERY long four years...... Shit.

Balls.....

What is "having balls" anyway? I mean not the LITERAL "possessing of testicles", but the PROverbial, having balls. I mean, there is a VERY fine line between courage and stupidity, a fine line between bravery and idiocy.... Right?

I mean, the obvious "stupid" shit aside, like the "Hold mah beer and come 'n' take a look at THIS!" scenarios and other stupid things that wind up on shows like Jackass and stuff. If I were to see a group of thugs beating up on a single individual, is it balls or stupidity that would send me into action. And what would that action be? I mean, I doubt that I would ignore what was going on. I don't think I'd just stand around and watch. I would be spurred into action. But what action would I take? And when does the line from having balls to being stupid get crossed?

If I stood up for what I believe in, despite the fact that I may end up standing alone, there are times when I might end up being ostracized because I did. I mean, there are so many different scenarios that one could come up with. But is that really considered "having balls"?

I realize that a lot of people wouldn't. I realize that because I have and I will, I am not like those others who won't or don't. (We've all seen it, right? Those people who do nothing and walk away.... It's called the bystander effect. Look it up.) I don't define these actions as "having balls" though. I think these situations are really about doing what's right. So then what?

Is "having balls" about doing something crazy, extreme, adrenaline pumping action type stuff? Bungee jumping, sky diving, zip lining, car racing, extreme sports? I mean, it does take a certain amount of courage to jump off a platform at high heights after looking down at the ground. (It's not the descent or rapid acceleration that kills/ hurts you. It's the sudden deceleration, after all.....) Or maybe "having balls" is doing something, despite the fact that you have trepidations or fears.

I have been called "ballsy" on more than one occasion, I've been told I have "balls the size of bowling balls", "brass balls", "king sized mega balls", "King Kamehameha of balls".... You get the idea. That's a lot of balls. I've always took it as a compliment.

I know that I have probably put way too much thought into this little notion of mine, but it's just another one of those random things floating around in my head.

Chef Mia.....

I love cooking. I'm not necessarily saying I'm any good at it, but I love being in the kitchen and whipping up concoctions of all sorts. Sometimes, if I'm feeling REALLY weird, I'll pretend that I'm on my own cooking show too:
"Add some of THIS shit, and aww fuck it! Throw some of this other shit in here too!"

It's pretty amusing. Well, it's amusing to me and I really only do it to amuse myself....

So, buying ingredients at the store is always a challenge, because I can almost taste the end result and I know how to get there, it's just that sometimes, the coming together of the flavors is difficult to achieve because I have a specific formula in my mind and sometimes, it doesn't quite work out in my favor the way I have it shaped in my mind. I'll admit, my secret formulas are hit or miss and thankfully, Puppy Guts seems to think that the things coming out of the kitchen are ALL fabulous and he will choke down anything I put in front of him, (the sweet man!) and pretend to happily eat it.

We've been trying to expand our tastes and palates by trying some new stuff. Both Puppy Guts and I are food people and we love to eat. Sure, we'll make it out to eat on occasion, but I love the idea of us being in the kitchen together and coming up with our own meals.

We just have to remember to leave the windows open BEFORE the smoke alarms go off though..... Yes. Smoke detector. More often times than not.

Exchanging "pleasantries".....

We all have to do it. There are times when we can't just blurt out what's on our minds. We have to maintain a certain level of civility because of whatever, even though GRRRR!!! The situation will call for one to pull up their big person pants and NOT throw an epic fit and throw down because you actually just want to tear someone's face off. You fake smile and fake laugh and fake care and fake everything, while on the inside you're raging and screaming and cussing and Hulk Smashing.....
Yeah.... I'm pretty sure if people could see inside my head and could see my thoughts, they'd need therapy for the rest of their lives.....

LEAVE THEM THE FUCK HOME THEN!!!!!!

You know, it's not that I mind that people have their kids out and about. I really don't have a problem with that. There are times when I have to bring mine with me when I have to go out to the market or something. Yeah, it's easier to get things done when it's just me, but sometimes, I don't have a choice. My children are well behaved, help out, are relatively polite and don't act like a bunch of assholes. My kids are not like little wild animals running around and screaming like little fucking maniacs in a store.

THEN you get the REAL winners. The kids screaming up and down the aisles, whining about wanting candy and cookies and frozen tv dinners and all sorts of crap. They claim they're tired and bored and hungry and sleepy and need to go to the bathroom. They're rolling around on the floors and kicking and throwing tantrums. They're crying and yelling and fighting and touching everything. They bump into everything and everyone and knocking shit down..... I swear, it takes everything I have not to pick those kids up and shake the bejesus out of them, tell them to shut the fuck up and drop them before beating the crap out of the parents. What the fuck?

My commentary is going to be rather brief about this topic because I could go on for DAYS on this subject. I understand that sometimes, a child will have a bad day and that tantrums happen, but it shouldn't be made EVERYONE'S mother fucking problem when out in public. But this excuse does NOT FLY when it's all of the kids, all at once and the only thing that the parent is doing is smiling the "kids will be kids" smile and makes stupid and sad excuses for her little shits. Seriously. Some people should have to have a license and take a test in order to have kids. Others should just be sterilized for the sake of humanity. Wait 'til I take over the world. Three words. Culling of population.