At least I'm honest about it....

I make no if's, and's, or but's about who I am. Rude, abrasive, crass, I cuss a lot (mostly because go fuck yourself), I complain about a lot of things, I whine about others, I'm flawed, imperfect, I'm cranky, and bitchy and over-caffeinated at times (fine.... MOST times..... Fine, ALL the time.....). I have attentional issues and O.C.D., I'm loud, obnoxious, annoying, and kind of dorky and I have a laundry list of quirks. But it's okay. I like who I am and I'm comfortable in my own skin.

And I get judged by people who live behind a facade, live a lie, and don't know who they really are because they're afraid of what they might see. And then, I get those same people who pretend to want to be my friend, while they talk about me behind my back because of everything that I am.... Nah... No thanks. I'm good.

Mooooooom!!!

There are times when I too like to reverse the tables a little and be a pain in the ass to my teen. The quickest way to ruffle his feathers for being an ultra pain in my ass is to put a chink in his coolness with his friends. Whether it's to "fix his hair" or "get that smudge" or ask if he's wearing a clean pair of underpants or saying, "I found those SPONGEBOB UNDERPANTS that you wanted! I washed them and put them in your drawer. Did you see them?" Yeah. Payback is a bitch.

"MO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-M!!!!!! Shut UP!!!!!!!!!!"

The damage is already done sweet pea. He always gets the same reply when he gets all mad. "You know why I did this... I told you I'd get even. You may think it's funny being a pain in the ass, but I've been a pain in the ass for FAR longer than you, N00B!"

I get the obligatory eye roll and exasperated sigh. "Fine.... Sorry...."

That's all I need really. I win again.

Back to SCHOOL!!!!!!

That's right. The calendar is marked with the giant red "X" of doom. Today is the first day back at school for the boys, leaving their sister home saying, "Are they all MY toys now, mama?" I'll be fighting with the boys to get them up, dressed, fed and ready for school and onto the bus on time. We start the "school schedule" once again and we all have to get used to the insanity of the school week. It's bittersweet. On the one hand, YAY! THEY'RE BACK TO SCHOOL!!!! On the other hand, it's not as much fun because they're not here because they're at school.

So, I'll be sitting with Mini Me and we'll be hanging out and doing our thing.... For one more year.... Then she'll be off to Kindergarten and I'll be left to sit and wait for all the munchkins, all by myself and..... :sniffle: I think I just heard something break..... Yup.... It was the sound of my heart. :(

Last Day of Summer Vacation....

I always have mixed feeling about the first day of school. On the one hand, there's quiet for a little while in the house. On the other hand, that quiet becomes deafening after the first couple of hours. I have to get up in the morning and deal with the hectic morning schedule and getting everyone out the door on time and onto the bus and stuff, but there's something about having them around and having that chaos throughout the whole day. It's crazy, but in a weird way, it brings me a sense of peace too....

So, now that we have come to the last day of summer vacation, we're going to try and do it up proper and squeeze in as much fun and frolick that we can in a day and make sure that we burn it all offbefore we go back to the "regularly scheduled program". Rock Star, don't fail me now!

Fleeting moments....

Yesterday was the funeral of a young boy named Kevin Bella who died suddenly in an accident. My eldest son knew him. They knew each other in school and spoke briefly from time to time. His reaction when he heard the news was, "Mom.... I know him...." and didn't quite grasp that it was the past tense of knew him. And right now my boy is trying to make heads or tails of the situation. I can't even begin to imagine what this boy's family must be going through right now in light of this newest tragedy in their lives as I watch my son struggle with it. Now, I can't say that I know the family or really say I knew the boy (except in passing from a comment my son made about him from time to time), but I can't exactly say that I don't feel a sadness and a sense of loss and my heart goes out to them. It's always a very sad thing when such a young life is lost, especially in a sudden and tragic accident like this. It's impossible not to feel something when you hear about something like this, especially when it's within your own community.

As much as I try to make sure I am "fixing" things in my life, living it to its fullest and making sure that my children and Lucky know that they are loved, I'm sure there will never be enough time for me to finish everything. I continue to make sure that I fill my life with the positives and not dwell on the trivialities that I come across. I live, I love, I laugh, I fill my life with good people, good food, good fun, good friends, good times, good music. I get things done, I say what needs to be said and I keep moving forward. It is a solid and almost tangible need to make sure that I do. 

I will never have a problem with someone coming to me and asking for help. I'll always be willing to lend an ear and listen, offer advice, be a shoulder to cry on... But when it really comes down to it, I'll not be someone's flotation device at the risk of drowning myself in someone else's sorrows, especially when that someone seems as if they enjoy being there. Hey, there are people who just like to be miserable and enjoy making other people miserable too. It's just important to make sure that you don't get caught up in all of it and BE dragged down. 

I re-learned some valuable lessons there. Cherish your loved ones and let them know that they are loved. They should never question your feelings for them. Let go of the things that are trivial and stupid. Dwelling on them does you no amount of good. Although making enemies can be fun sometimes, making friends is more valuable and is time better spent. There really is no need to make enemies where enemies don't need to be made. I'd really just prefer not to be bothered with people I couldn't care less about anyway. Do the things that you enjoy and live in the moment. If life is going to be a series of events that lead you to an end, why not make them positive and worthwhile? And the hard hitting reality that life is terminal. It does and will end and it's never certain when, where or how. 

So now, I pray that Kevin has found peace and sanctuary in the arms of his Savior in heaven and I pray that the loved ones that he left behind eventually find peace and comfort themselves.

It seems that this little boy lived quite a life despite everything else going on in his own life, he carried forth and took on life by the horns, an admirable movement forward and he kept on chugging, along while other kids in similar positions would have withered. He went out doing what he loved best and I'm really thinking that he may to not have had too many regrets about his actions while he was having the time of his life. I wish we could all go that way. Unfortunately for Kevin, his end came way too soon and I suppose it's THAT what screws with the sensibilities of the others trying to muddle through the whole thing and can only make assumptions from the many different things that we're all hearing . From what I've hear and read, Kevin was a well liked boy, liked by all and had the kind of life that spoke volumes about what an amazing little guy he was. What an amazing son he was. The kind of kid that made other parents say to their kids, "I wish you had a little bit of Kevin in you...." and it grieves me for my son's sake that , he won't have that little guy running around in the halls with him any more and learn a little something.

We sometimes take the things that we see and have in our every day lives for granted. How is it that we can go about life, skirting around as if nothing could ever go wrong? I get that we shouldn't be fearful of everything that could possibly go wrong and be afraid to step out into the world because of things that may or may not happen. And we certainly shouldn't feed these phobias to our own children either. I guess what I am saying is that we should be thankful for the things we have in our lives. Be thankful for the people we have in our lives. Be thankful for the things we are given, because life is rather fleeting and rather quite fragile, and keeping that in mind as we go out and live it. People often take for granted the time that they have on this earth with their family and friends, things get put aside because we often take for them for granted. The time that people have on the earth with their families, friends and the things they have. Things  that are yet to be done. Things we want to accomplish, things we want to do... Things get put off to the wayside because "there's always tomorrow". You never really think about how fleeting life really is until you are faced with a moment in time when the reality of it all slaps you right in the face. To be faced with the fact that there may not be a tomorrow and things may be left undone.

I mean, I get it. Most times, it's impossible for us to see that such tragedies can happen in our own lives because "it can't happen to me. That kind of stuff happens to other people..." but there you have it. So very close to home, feeling the ripple effect and trying to reflect on it and make sense of it, but coming up empty handed.

And what of trying to cope with such a loss when it's so unexpected? Even as an adult, it's hard to comprehend and wrap your mind around it, but I guess when you aren't emotionally and mentally equipped to deal with such a loss, it might be even more very frightening. My boy, being only 14, seems confused and rather befuddled by it. The Xbox Live lines have been abuzz between he and his friends who remember this young boy and yet his loss isn't quite real to them. My son goes back and forth between sadness and what almost seems like denial. He's never dealt with a loss like that so close to home.

I've been trying to give him his space while he shuffles through his feelings, all while letting him know that I am available to talk about whatever he is feeling. I kept him abreast of when and where the wake and funeral were. He was going to go, then he didn't want to, then he did, then he didn't.... It's all passed now and I hope he doesn't regret the fact that he ended up not going to either. On the other hand, he and his friends are remembering this boy and coping together in their own way. They've decided to wear red shirts on the first day of school because their friend's favorite color was red.... I guess we all have our own ways of dealing and coping. It's rather comforting to know that they are dealing, but on the other side of that, it pains me to think that they have to deal with such a loss at such a young age.

Although I am only able to give comfort to my son about his classmate, I can only hope that this boy's family come to heal as my thoughts go out to him and his family. A lesson that we can all take away from this is that we should cherish our loved ones every opportunity that we have so that we never have to regret the things that were left unsaid. We should learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning. (a quote that comes to mind.... Not mine though)

 So many thoughts ran through my mind. I thought about this young Kevin Bella who would be missing out on so much more of what potentially could have been "the rest of his life". I thought about the family he left behind and how much so many more of their 'lives" they would miss him at in their lives. I thought about his many friends and how they wouldn't be able to call him up and say, "Wow! Dude! That sucked! Hey, let's hang out..." after the wake. His sudden death was such a shock to everybody. Quite literally a "one minute he was there, and the next minute, he was gone..." and that was it. A single moment in time when everything changes. Shattering, altering, jarring... Whatever you want to call it. A single moment and the world changed for those closest to this young boy.

It all stems from a reality based lesson that I re-learn from time to time and I'll admit, some hit harder than others. The effects of seeing tragedies, whether they are grand scale or not, affects me in a way that it causes me to think seriously about the course of my life. Sometimes I linger too long in the shallows, where negativity and bad feelings fester in the cloudy pools of muck, when clearer waters lay so close. All it would take is to tromp away from the muck and ooze and clean off in the clean waters and wade out to a nicer place, but I have to ask why it is that I linger a little too long in the shallows. Then I have to ask myself why it is that I keep coming back to everything that should mean so little and not concentrate on the things that aren't trivial. Deeper thoughts reveal a guilt I sometimes feel that needs to be rectified, deeper insights may reveal an anger issue I thought I had rid myself of. Self introspection is something one cannot run away from when everything gets thrown onto you all at once and trying to sort through everything can sometimes seem overwhelming. That's when I strap up my ass kicking boots and clear away the crap with a sledgehammer and a shovel and deal with what I can. I deal with the things that I "own". I can't help some of the things I don't since some of the problems I got thrown into was not necessarily mine. I was tossed in, without warning, without a word... Thrown into the lion's den with no weapons in the first round, into someone else's crap so that they wouldn't be the only ones drowning in their own troubles. But through much thought and rationalizing, I always come to the same conclusions and I end up crawling out of the muck and walking away from what ever self induced misery that others seem to put themselves in and stop letting them drag me in to drown me in their sorrows along with them. Life is too short and I haven't the time to wallow in someone else's muck when I'm doing my best to wash away my own.

May a thousand angels carry you home, Kevin. Know that people who knew you and many of those that didn't send along positive thoughts and prayers to you and your family. Love and hugs to you and yours go out to you from me and mine. Rest now.

Roping them back in.....

As we get closer to the end of summer vacation, I need to start reining the kids back in again. And of course, it falls on me to get the shit done. Getting them back onto a schedule, getting them back into a routine. Getting them back into the groove of things and making sure that they are back in line and ready for the upcoming new school year.

It's not an easy task when the kids are all still in denial that their summer vacation is about to come to a close. But that doesn't mean I can't NOT get all the ducks back in a row and that they are following the proper protocols and getting done the things they need to do and falling back into line. I mean during the vacation, they have all the time in the world to clean their rooms and make their beds and get their shoes lined up by the door and put their stuff away and all that other crap, but when school takes up a good chunk of their time? We have to resort back to the schedule or the shit is just not going to get done and I won't tolerate THAT kind of backsliding.

:sigh: I know that they might see me as being somewhat of a bitch now, but my hopes are that one day they realize I would have been doing them a disservice had I NOT raised them properly. That there was a reason why I made them get the things they needed to do, done and getting a job done means getting a job done well and all that other happy shit that I get all sorts of O.C.D. with them about. I hope they realize that was because I wanted them to grow to be proper adults who know how to get shit done on time and well. In the meantime, I must live through the constant barrage of eye rolls and exasperated sighs. It's all good though.

Last Hurrahs!

In an effort to try and give my kids some last hurrahs, we have decided that we were going to attempt a summertime snowball fight. You are now asking yourself, "What the hell is a summertime snowball fight?" Let me explain:

The kids and I watched some stupid movie. I don't even remember what it was, but we did come away with this awesome idea. A summertime snowball fight. Cut up pieces of nylon stockings, knotted, filled with flour and knotted at the other end. VOILA! "Snowball". You make about a gojillion of them, divide them up between all the players, goggle up and send them flying! They hit, POOF! Cloud of flour. Pick it up and throw it again until they're empty. Have fun. What's the problem? Just like with any other "fun" activity, it's messy.

Yes, it's messy. It's gross and oh my god, did I mention it's messy? Yeah. It's messy. But I can guarantee, it is a fun time, a great photo op when everyone is covered in flour and with a hose, everything and everyone cleans up pretty quickly, and as an added bonus, you have just created a memory with your kids that is going to last a lifetime. I mean, come on! What kid is going to forget something like that? Yet there are parents who will shy away from this sort of shit because "it makes a mess". Hello? THAT is what childhood is supposed to be. Messy with glitter and paint and clay and mud and "what the hell is this??!??" and sticky stuff and gooey things and slimy crap and stuff that may or may not wash out, and let's not forget that stuff that smells funny and that no one knows what it is. They shouldn't be afraid of any of that stuff! If you teach them to fear stuff from the get go, they live with fears all their lives. Not cool.

You don't get to "redo" things. This is VERY true with the raising of your children. Sure, there may be things that I wish I would have done differently. Maybe I shouldn't have reacted the way I did or said some of the things that I did, but the things I AM doing are FAR outweighing the things that I have done and I think that makes all the difference in the world. At least I hope I am. I'm not perfect and I am going to make mistakes. I admit that to my kids. I think that it's important for all parents to admit to their kids when they are wrong. It says, "No one is perfect, but it is important that we are able to admit that and take the steps to correct our mistakes." But this childhood stuff is very fleeting and goes by in an instant. And there's SO much stuff you have to fit in into that brief moment. Why should it be of apprehension of new things, being creative, getting messy and trying something? It shouldn't. These are things we should be nurturing in our children.

It's not the most easy task, but it is the most rewarding when I actually see the results of my handiwork. When my children are the ones going out and doing. When my children are the ones who are pioneering the path and they are the first ones in line. When my children are the ones who are showing the rest of the world that they can, and even if they fall, they are the ones who get right back up and try again. As it ought to be. We're ready to take on another round of messy fun that'll probably make a huge mess, but will leave lasting and positive impressions in their lives. KEWL. Bring it!

Get ready..... Get set.....

Not too many days left of being able to sleep all day until I get tired.... School begins in a few days and we all have to get used to early and hurried mornings and firmed up schedules and the general craziness that comes with a school year. We'll be going back to the hustle and bustle of our regularly scheduled program. We'll use these last few days to squeeze in as much fun or whatever that we can and enjoy what's left of this thing called summer vacation.

Between water balloons, sparklers, summertime snowballs, water squirters, and stuff like that, I am hoping that we can squeeze in some last minute fun. The fun time clock is slowly winding down and the seconds seems to be ticking away faster and faster, but it feels like there is so much more fun that is left to be had....

:sigh: We got spoiled by the summer vacation and reality is going to be bringing it all to a screeching halt. It won't be long before the alarm clock will be waking us at o'dark hundred and the regular routine comes screaming back at us telling us to get our asses out of bed to get back to the regularly scheduled program. Yay..... I miss the first day of summer vacation already.....

Every TIME!!!!!!!!

My teen does things to push my buttons. A lot. He says it's "just to be a pain in the ass..." Well, at least he's honest about it. I mean we have a relatively good relationship even though he thinks I'm an ultra mega Dork-a-zoid. We talk about things and we are able to communicate with each other about all manner of things, which is kind of cool.

My biggest beef with him right now is that I don't really have any good recent photos of him. Don't get me wrong, I have recent pictures of him. I have tons of recent pictures of all the kids. But the teen's pictures are not very flattering. He's always making the goofy faces or covering his face with his hand at the last second. :sigh:

He says he makes the faces because he's making fun of me and the way I look in pictures. I've tried to explain to him that it isn't on purpose. I just look like a moron in pictures all the time because I'm not very photogenic. He says to me, "Seriously? Wow.... I'm so sorry..... That's pretty..... special, mom..."

How am I supposed to respond to that? You know, so I say, "Gee thanks kid.... I can't help that I'm funny looking. Be thankful that you don't look like me." Ya know? It'd be nice if, at this point, he would put up a protest and say something like, "Nah, mom! You're so pretty!" Even if it's just lip service, ya know? But, no. He giggles and agrees with me.

So I then proceed to beg and plead for him to let me take one picture of him NOT making a face or something and..... Yeah. It didn't happen. :s

Teen Convos....

My teen has his buddies over at the house often and they hang out in his room (two doors down from mine) and talk or he communicates with his friends on the phone or online or on his XBox.... It's the most ridiculous and inane bunch of blabbering I've ever heard! I realize that he and his friends think that they are having serious conversations about serious things and it's all VERY important to them, but some of the conversations are seriously barely a step above stupid. Example: (Part of an ACTUAL  conversation that I transcribed, word for word just the other day.....)

"So, like.... I was all, like..... "Dude!" And he was all, like, "What?" And I was, like, all sorts of, like, "Dude..."

"I KNOW! And remember when he was all, like, "Whoa!" and like was all like "DUDE!"

And after listening to an hour of that... (And I swear, that was the content of the whole hour long conversation.) I was ready to tear my hair out. I think I may have lost some IQ points and some of my brain cells were reported to have committed suicide. I heard the words, "dude", "whoa", "like" and "all" more times in 15 minutes than one would hear in both "Bill and Ted" movies. (Did I just date myself a little there? Perhaps I did.... )

I get that, to them, these are very important conversations and that they are moving mountains and changing the world with every word. I get that for the time being, these conversations are completely relevant and revolutionary. I can also understand that right now, THIS is what their lives are all about and that is their world. But in all honesty..... Well...... Really? I swear I went a little crossed eyed by the time they were done.

Out of curiosity, wondering whether ANY of them knew what the hell they were talking about, I went to my son's room and simply said, "Huh??!??" So, he explained. Apparently, "....throughout a whole entire day of school some time last year, there were a few individuals who were causing trouble and wreaking havoc throughout the school, but by the end of the day, they were apprehended, totally busted and suspended... It was pretty awesome because these guys are real jerks and they were so cocky and thought they wouldn't get caught, but they did.... :snicker: Epic!"

I guess it's a teen thing or whatever, but an hour long conversation using only the words "like", "all", "dude", and "whoa" conveyed all of that... Go figure. I need to brush up on my "Teen-ese" or something.... I wonder if they make a "Rosetta Stone" for that.... :s

PMS Bunny......

Yes, I sleep with a teddy.... Actually, I call it PMS (pronounced pims) bunny. It used to be PMS bear, but Puppy Guts killed him, so I had to get another. Unfortunately, they didn't have any more bears, so I got a bunny.

It is a microwaveable stuffy that stays nice and warm and soothes away stresses with a light lavender-y scent. I wuvs my PMS bunny.... Shut up. You're just jealous.

More picture issues.....

It's bad enough that there really aren't any great pictures of me. Hell, I'd settle for a good picture or even a decent picture.... No such luck. I am the epitome of NON-photogenic. With that being said however, in going through some old pictures of myself, still with the same stupid look and doofy smile and that certain "special quality" on my face in all of those pictures, I came to realize something. I really haven't changed much.

I have seen people I had "grown up with" and I have to say, some of them have NOT aged well. Yeah....the  "That 21 years since high school really have not been kind to you...." type of "not aged well". (Yes.... Do the math... I'm 39...)  I know a few that haven't changed at all, I mean AT ALL and I kind of wonder whether or not they made some deal with the devil or something, ya know?

So, there I was, looking at pictures of myself from back in elementary school, middle school, high school and it was weird. Same stupid, crooked, idiotic smile, goofy look, "special" quality, but other than hair color, hair style, and maybe some more freckles, I still look like the same idiot in the pictures from back then... I'm certainly the same height since I haven't grown since the sixth grade. I'm the same weight. Hell, I still have T-shirts from back then that I still wear. It's almost like looking at the same goofy picture.... Creepy.....

So?

I've been tired of having to have to make apologies for who I am and it seems like sometimes I'm still doing it anyway. I am not talking about making apologies because I was wrong. I am not talking about saying "I'm sorry" because I did something wrong. I am talking about having to say, "Yeah.... Sorry.... It's who I am...." because I got a strange look from someone or I got some disapproving tongue click because someone didn't approve of the way I am. I always end up thinking back at the moment and ask myself, "Why the fuck did I apologize for that shit??!?? It's not as if I needed their approval for who I am or what I did..." The feeling never really lasts long and I'm usually over it by the time the next thought hits a second later, but it sometimes gives me pause to think about it.

I've gotten a lot better about not doing it and the higher I hold my head up and go about my business, the less people notice. It proves to me that people really do fear "different" and are willing to go about bullying that "different" out of someone and make them become what these people who are afraid define as "normal". Boring. Cookie cutter. Just like everyone else. Just like themselves. It seems if I look apologetic about who I am, it can be beaten out of me. And people will take full advantage of a person's weakness because, let's face it, people are shitty creatures. People fear change. People fear the different.

I tried to reason out where this fear comes from. Is it that they are afraid that "different" is bad or is it that they are so unhappy with their own lives that they need to bring down everybody else into their sinking ship of a miserable existence. I mean, it has to be pretty miserable just being. Not having an original thought or having the creativity to be something other than "normal"... It's not like I'm running around in Spiderman Underoos and chaps, a sequined disco top, feather boa, giant Elton John glasses and a day glo green beret, while singing the llama song at the top of my lungs and doing the cha cha in public. I guess I seem pretty normal on the outside. (Maybe save for the multicolored hair and the t-shirt of the day that may or may not have some snarky comment on it or something....). It's what happens on the inside that sometimes makes me stand out. ESPECIALLY when the stuff on the inside spills out in my outside voice. The "censor" in my brain that filters the stuff that comes out of my mouth malfunctions sometimes. I make strange observations or weird jokes or whatever and that shit just comes right out of my mouth. (Want proof? Mine and Puppy Guts' Facebook page totally reads that way....) What can I say? But I don't think that it merits some of the reactions that it does.

I get how most people are so wrapped up in the way other people perceive them. I don't get that at all, but there you have it. There is a certain persona or facade that people want the world to see and that the thoughts of those in the world around them are more important than just being themselves. What the fuck kind of life is that? Here you are having to crush the very thing that you are simply because it matters more to you what others think about you. How the fuck does that make any kind of sense?

I mean, think about it. These people have to act one way when they're with "friends", act another when they're with their other "friends", there's a different persona when they're out in public, another when they're with family..... What the hell kind of shit is that? Wouldn't it be so much easier if they were who they were all the time to everyone they encountered? I guess it wouldn't be so great if one was an absolute cunt or douchewad or pansy assed pussy, but honestly.... Wouldn't those things be fixed if these people were to do the right thing, fix their god damned mistakes, make them right, move along and NOT act like an absolute cunt or douchewad or pansy assed pussy?

I won't be making too many more apologies for who and what I am. Unless I was being an absolutely malicious cunt wad or something, in which case, I would, but having been on the receiving end of some pretty brutally malicious shit over my lifetime, I reserve being a malicious cunt wad only for REALLY deserving assholes, and in that case, they will have deserved my wrath, so no apologizing there.... Meh.... This was all just a random thought really.... I will probably have to go and reflect on this one some more.....

It's not MY fault you're stupid....

Some people seriously need a tap on the head...... with a hammer. Or maybe perhaps a slap in the face...... with a metal folding chair. Or maybe even just a smack on the butt.... with the front bumper of a souped up American muscle car going at some ridiculous speed. How about a punch in the face...... with a jack hammer. You know those people. They're thicker than two thick things stuck together thick-ways... You know, whatever....

Stubby....

I am a very ill proportioned person. I have a long trunk and short stubby legs. (Although I am rather thankful that I am taller than I am wide...) I am short (I don't think I'm even of "average" height), wiry and nothing is proportionate. But everything functions and everything works and it all works for me. I'm kind of awesome like that! :)

Happy!

A little happy moment! Sometimes it's great to stop and take a few to celebrate one, even if it's not that big of a deal. It could be something as simple as a great cup of coffee or finding a twenty in the wash. Yup.... My geriatric dog taught me that. Yesterday, I watched him find a sunny spot on the floor and roll around in it for like a solid three minutes and fall asleep right there.

I think we forget to take time and be grateful and stuff for the little happy moments that we are blessed with because they aren't BIG events. Life really isn't about of series of big events though. It's really all about the little ones that lead up to the big ones.

Thanks Otis....

I am DURRRRR?

I will never claim that I am a super genius because, well.... I'm not. I'm not stupid by any stretch of the imagination and I can do alright in a conversation using big words and stuff... I can do math and spell and tie my shoes. I function.

Enter my complaint. I don't dress to please anybody else. I dress for comfort. I keep my hair in a whole array of colors from "natural tones" to pinks and blues. So, based solely on the way I look, there are people who assume I'm none too bright. Whatever. They can think what they'd like. That's fine. It's the people who think it necessary to point out to me that they find that the way I dress or look makes me look less than intelligent. The ones who go out of their way to get my attention and speak slowly and let me know what they think.... Which is fine. But MAN these people really can't take what they dish out and they have NO sense of humor at all....

I'm not one for keeping my mouth shut, especially in situations like this. And I also think that if people are going to open their mouths, they should expect a reply. I mean, just because someone thinks I'm an idiot and goes out of their way to let me know that they believe me to be mentally deficient, it doesn't mean I'm not going to fire back with some kind of a retort about what I feel about them. The looks of shock when I lay down (to cause as MUCH public shame to them as I possibly can) a response to their ignorant statements is priceless though.

Summertime Fare.....

Summertime brings the nommy nom-ness of barbecue... Meat and meat and... um..... MEAT. Did I mention the meat? Yeah I guess some grilled veggies would be nice too, but MEAT.

I love sitting outside and sniffing all the wonderful aromas. Someone is ALWAYS barbecuing somewhere and that nommy smell gets wafted from far and wide, doesn't it? I love the smell of the searing meat and sometimes with BBQ sauce, sometimes not. Spiced, herbed, marinated, rubbed.... Whatever. It's all good! I'm not picky! MEAT!

I am hoping that I am able to consume MORE barbecue noms than I ever have before, making THIS YEAR a record breaking year.... And I want to be able to do that every year from here on out. :sigh: BLISS! Bring on the barbecue!

No bacons..... :(

I don't understand HOW someone can mistake MY food for THEIR food.... I buy the bacon. I cook up bacon. I put it in the fridge. It's packaged up all nice-y nice, labeled and hidden away, but no. SOME PEOPLE think that they are well within their rights to nom on my bacon even though it says on the label, "MIA'S BACON!!!! DON'T MOTHER FUCKING TOUCH MY BACON. Thank you."

:sigh: I have a sad now because I has no bacons.... This sucks ass.

Time out fails.....

Time outs really only work if the person giving the time out truly means it and backs up that time out with actions and words. A simple conversation explaining why the child was put there, the reasons why that behavior was unacceptable and be able to discuss this with the child AFTER he/ she is able to speak calmly and coherently. They also have to know that your actions are going to be consistant EVERY time and that harsher punishment will be doled if the behavior continues. They need to know that the behavior WILL NOT be tolerated and that punishment will ensue.

Time out is a great time for both the offended and the offendee can take a moment to calm down and rationally think about things before coming back to discuss. It never does ANY amount of good when you're both pissed off anyway. The child is pissed because he/ she got caught and got in trouble. The parent is pissed because, well, what the hell was he/ she thinking, thinking that <WHATEVER THE OFFENSE WAS> was a good idea??!?? You taught them better than that, right? Well, it's time to lay down the hammer and make sure that he/ she knows not to EVER do that again.... Right? And once THAT happens, he/ she WON'T ever do that again..... Right?

Yeah, right.....

Pictures....

My Puppy Guts and I have a lot of pictures of ourselves that are taken in a "self shot" manner. My arms aren't long enough so we have quite a few that are out of focus and right up the nose. Puppy Guts has arms that are longer and we have a few pretty decent shots too. There are pictures of us in all sorts of places with all sorts of people taken during our random rabble rousing adventures. It's become something of a "thing" for us and it also helps to make a little momento of all the things that we've done when we rabble rouse.

Pictures are a funny thing. Going back through old photos to a moment that you had forgotten, but it all becomes as clear to you as if it happened yesterday. Sometimes, you remember your exact thoughts when the picture was taken. You remember the moment, you remember the occasion, everything. Other times, you're looking at the picture and you're thinking, "When the hell was this taken and where the fuck was I?" There are probably picture that bring you back and make you think, "Oh my GOD! I look like such a dork!" (Which for me, is more often than for most....) It's a pretty cool thing, pictures.

It's the reason why I like that Puppy Guts and I photo document our lives. From the little moments to the big ones, we have pictures of everything so that one day, when we're stupid old and stuff, we can look back on these memories and say, "THAT was a fun day, wasn't it?" and keep on having things to talk about even then.