Feeling crappy: How to make it worse.

I seriously do need to sty away from WebMD when I'm feeling like crap. I don't know why it is that, even knowing what I'm ailing from, I find myself perusing that cursed sight to see what else I could be suffering from. I mean, there I am, having a case of indigestion from eating bad cheese, I go cruising around WebMD, and then FLABAMMO! Prostate cancer.

I'm beginning to think that I may have magically grown a prostate or something. There's no other explanation.