Compliments....

I don't take compliments very well. Actually, I really don't know how to respond to them. And it has a lot to do with my parents conditioning me to wait for the kick in the pants.  They've never really paid me a compliment. I mean, when it's, "Wow! That's a great shirt! It looks like crap on you!" or "Your hair looks FABULOUS! Your face? Not so much....." or "Wow! You did a great job, but it could have been so much better if you had......." That was basically how it was and how it still is.

So, now a days, I just can't take a compliment too seriously. Having become jaded over the years hasn't helped either. I find most people to be two faced and absolutely unreliable. I tend not to believe anything that I hear coming out of the mouths of most of the people I know or run across. And it becomes a problem I guess. There might be the rare and occasional person who is really trying to pay me a compliment and I'm all, "Uh huh.... Okay. I like pie!"

I don't mean to offend, but, it's just who I am. I can't really recall a real compliment that was given to me by my parents. Just a simple "Hey that's awesome!" kind of thing. They were always followed up with a "but". You know, "......but your sister is so much smarter.", "..... but I don't understand what he/ she sees in you!", ".....there's nothing really outstanding or special about you...." That kind of shit. Oh, no, I am being absolutely serious. This was my life and still IS. It used to be something that bothered me quite a bit, but it's not the case any more.

I found that they are MORE bothered by having that meanness pointed out because I KNOW that they know, they are being less than courteous. They ESPECIALLY find it humiliating when I point it out in front of other people. I take my jabs whenever I can. Call it immature and vindictive, but I'm keeping this one.