Happy New Years Eve!

Wishing everyone a safe and happy New Years eve and a super fantastic 2012!

Self Help-y people....

I've never really understood the whole, "self help" thing where you have some guy or gal telling you how to make your life better and whatnot. It kind of defeats the whole purpose if you have to have someone TELL you how to be happy, no? I mean, here you have some"speaker" of sorts telling you how you should live your life in order for you to be happy. Meanwhile, this person is laughing himself to the bank thinking, "SUCKERS! I fed you all a bunch of bullshit and you all paid to hear it and I'm filthy rich, living the life you all wish you had!"
The key to being happy isn't what someone else tells you it is. It isn't a matter of someone telling you how to get it either. It's a personal journey that you have to discover on your own. I think people miss the point of that. Just sayin'....

Because I SAID SO!

"Because I said so!" is sometimes SO perfect to give as a reason when dealing with your child. It's the lamest things too that a child will choose to pick a battle with a parent. "But WHY do I have to clean my room??!??" or "But WHY do I have to do my homework??!??" It's so lame and you know damn well yourself that you're thinking, "Yeah, it does suck and I really DON'T know why!" but you know that you have to play the role of "parent" and you know damn well that the task needs to be completed. So the "logical" response really  DOES become, "Because I SAID SO!" Ahhh, parenthood.

Why is it....

I could be not doing too much of anything throughout the whole entire day. The kids won't need me for anything, so I get caught up on stuff to do around the house. I'm not sure if the phone ringing triggers some kid of chemical something that activates children's "annoy" glands, but the second my phone rings, THAT'S when I become a high demand commodity. All of them need me RIGHT THEN AND THERE. How does that work.... I was just curious was all...

YAY!

I SURVIVED THE HOLIDAYS! NO MORE CHRISTMAS UNTIL NEXT YEAR!!! WOOT!

Yeah, yeah... Merry Christmas....

Alright..... FINE! Merry Christmas, if you're in to that sort of stuff.... There. I said it. Okay? Are you happy?
Someone please pass me a plate of noms....

Christmas Eve....

Merry Christmas Eve, Puppy Guts. It'll be nice to wake up on Christmas morning and see you there. What a great Christmas present! I love you to squishy little bits, all over the place! XOXOX

Kids and Christmas....

Come on! As far as the kids are concerned, Christmas is all about the presents. Maybe a little but about the food, but who gives a shit about the food, there's presents. And of course the all knowing, ever elusive Santa Claus. (I still say he's a closet child molester. He knows when you are sleeping? He knows when you're awake? Really? Sounds like a stalker to me... Just sayin'....) Sure, I don't care much about the holidays, but there is something so pure and innocent about the joy of a child on Christmas. The sheer excitement that it brings to them. Seeing the anticipation on their little faces as they count down the days is something that brings a smile to my face. My kids gear up for the trip to their dad's and they celebrate with him and his family. There's something to be said for that. They get to spend unencumbered time with their dad and his family and they really do up the holidays "propah" to make sure that the kids have a great time.
I am also grateful that "Christmas" doesn't get "lost" to them either. They are given the proper "meaning of Christmas", which I wouldn't be able to provide simply because of the "Christian nature" of the "other half of their family". I myself didn't have the "Christian upbringing" so for me to try and preach to my children about Christian holidays is somewhat counterproductive.
Tonight, I will be making the drive up north to deliver my children to their grandparents' house where they will spend the holidays. It's rather bittersweet. I know that they'll be having a great time, but on the other side of that, I'll be missing them terribly.
:sigh: It's all good. I'll have them back for New Years and we'll do it up "propah" then.

Dun dun daaaaaaaah ..........

So, it turns out that we have come to another one of those omen-y, prediction-y, end of the world type thingie dingy days. Whether it was Nostradamus, the ancient Incans or whoever, tomorrow is yet another one of them. :sigh:
I mean, I know that I've lived through a whole bunch of them in my lifetime and obviously, nothing ever came of them and we all survived... So in another moment where I gave a something WAY too much thought, I started thinking about the law of averages here.... I mean, let's think about this for a second. EVENTUALLY, the possibility that one of these times, one of those predictions might be right and considering how many weren't, doesn't that sort of mean that the possibility for it to be right increases now that we've used up the "wrong" ones?
And then, what would the end of the world be like? Are we going to be unaware and blinked out of existence in the blink of an eye and POOF!, done? Or is it going to be more of the long suffering "You're gonna experience the worst time of your life and watch everyone you love around you die a horrible death!" kind of things.... Maybe it's going to be a zombie apocalypse. Maybe it's going to be the biblical, four horsemen, Revelations type thing.... and the unknown of THAT whole deal-y makes things a little more frightening.
Yes, I know. I think about weird stuff WAY too often. THAT'S bad enough. But then I take it to the next level and over think them.... :sigh: It's all part of my charm.

COOTIES!

We're here at that time of year again where with all the holiday stuff and the festivities and crap... People pretending to be all nice and stuff and shaking hands and hugging and junk and stuff.... The close talkers and the touchy, feel-y people in the social gatherings that inevitably take place during such holiday festivities.... If you think about it, it's the most cootie-est time of the year. Flu's and colds and fever-y type crappiness... It's THAT time of year and here people are being all personal space invasion-y. Strangers being all extra friendly and WAY too personable. Blech!
Ugh.... The holidays.....Pfft!

Not what I thought.....

Well, last night, I went to take a shower, only to discover that there was no hot water. With teeth chattering, I lathered up and then got shampoo in my eye. While cussing about the cold water and the burning sensation in my eye, I continued to experience hypothermia as I rinsed off. I thought the worst would be over. I was wrong.
I dropped the bottle of conditioner on my toe and the bottle cracked spilling out it's contents all over the place. And of course now, there's a nice slick coating of slippery stuff all over the bottom of the shower floor.  In trying to re-coop some of the spilled conditioner from the shower floor, I slipped and fell on (surprise!) my face. I managed, through grit teeth, a bloody nose and with barely working limbs and fingers (from the cold),  to get enough conditioner worked through my hair, but not before I snagged my ring in it and ripped out a clump of hair.
I finally got myself rinsed off completely as I shivered and shut the now ice cold  water. I probably would have been better off hosing off in the front yard outside... Whatever. I had wounds to attend to.
I reached for my towel, only to discover that it was cold and wet. Someone had used my towel. Yuck! I hate that. So I opened the cabinet door (to get a new towel out), right into my toe! Yippee! The hits just keep on coming! I dry off and start nursing my burning eye, my flattened toe, my bruised face, my bloody nose and I admired the little bald spot on the side of my head while trying to get the feeling back into my extremities. The chattering of my teeth made my face hurt more and I ended up biting my tongue. Grrr.....
I haphazardly slipped into my warm fluffy fleece-y jams, missed a button, undid the buttons to button them up right and wrapped up in a fluffy yummy fleece-y robe and pulled on my warm fleece-y boots. Ah.... Warming up, but still rather grumpy over this whole shower ordeal as I was re-packing my nose with toilet paper because someone used the last of the tissues and didn't replace the box.
I went into my children's rooms to check up on them. All of them were tucked into their beds and sleeping soundly and it brought a sense of calm and happiness to me. They were snuggled in their blankets, everything well in their world. My daughter, whom I always check last because she's usually in my bed with me, was tucked into her "usual place" right next to me nestled among Fred, her favorite blanket and Goggy, her cherished bear. I couldn't help but smile.
I spent some quality time on the couch with my Puppy Guts and we laughed and chatted and snuggled and stuff, eating cheese and crackers with my Mitchie and Otis and it was great.
At the end of the night, when the guys left and I was going through the bedtime routine, I sat at my desk trying for all the world to write up some kind of rant that I can go on about what a crappy shower I had to endure and the words just didn't flow the way I wanted them to. So I sat and stared at the cold and unfeeling keys that gave me no indication as to where I should go with this post. So, I went to bed.

My weekend started off with arts and crafts and games and fun and tree trimming and "fake Christmas eve" dinner and ice cream sundaes and cocoa and a movie with all six of the children. Then yesterday, Lucky and I woke up and had relaxed brekkies at OUR table with all six of the kiddos at the condo, and did a makeshift "Christmas morning" in "OUR home". We chilled out in our jams. Later on, we got dressed up to take the "holiday portrait". We opened presents that were under OUR Christmas tree, had some cocoa and made gingerbread houses. We chilled out, enjoyed the "Christmas type feeling", had an early dinner and me and mine came back to the place where we are allowed to sleep and Lucky brought his children to where they live. It was insanity, but we were all having the time of our lives. It was hectic, but somehow, we managed. It all went smoothly. As crazy as the day was, it was enjoyable and it all went as planned. After the terrible wretched shower, I even got to hang out with my man AND my bestie...
At the end of a day like this, for me to be complain that my shower was the most stressful part of that day? Put into perspective, the day rocked and I warmed up pretty quick in my jammies. I awoke this morning to find that I'm fine and although my face is a little sore, I've done worse. My four babies, no doubt, dreamed away about the adventures we had this weekend and they are as healthy and happy as could be. The weekend was accomplished WELL and the kids and Lucky and I had a great time! A great end to an awesome weekend.
When I look at it THAT way, I guess I can be thankful that the shower was the only truly stressful thing that I had going and even THAT got done successfully. I didn't say, it went smoothly, but it got done. I succeeded without injuring myself too severely in the process.

I really thought that this was going to turn into another foul mouthed rant about how everything sucks, but I honestly say I don't feel that way any more. Humph! Go figure! We now return to our regularly scheduled program where I hate all things Christmas. :)

Holiday picture...

It was that time of the season to slap the kids into matching outfits and have them sit for a "holiday portrait". This year, Lucky and I decided we were going to do things a little differently. We are going to take all six kids to do a whole group shot and leave the elf touching reindeer molester out of the photo. WOW..... All six of them in a picture. Together. The possibilities for the fun just seem endless!
The tree was trimmed last night and the seed of anticipation was planted in their heads for this morning and sure enough we woke up to all six kids doing the "can we open our presents now?" dance. With that done and breakfast out of the way, attempts shall now be made to get them into their "doofus wear" and sit together for a picture while trying to get them all to look at the camera, smile without making the goofy faces, and snap the perfect picture.... Fine. I'll settle for surviving the ordeal.... :) 
Let the cuteness begin!

Our Christmas....

Okay, I hate Christmas, but there is something very cool about seeing the excitement on my children's faces on "Christmas morning". The chaos and havoc, the sounds of excitement and laughter as they tear into their presents. Our Christmases are pretty lean, but it doesn't seem to matter too much to my kids. They're kind of awesome like that.We don't have  "Santa Claus". We have Randy the Magical Christmas Troll. He comes into the night on "fake Christmas Eve" to deliver the presents to the house and hides all the presents around the house like Easter eggs. The household will be awakened at o'dark hundred hours and coffee will be made and the kids go to town.... Any second now, they'll be up screaming, "RANDY WAS HERE!!!!!!" It's going to be a hoot.

Once this day is done, we'll be going to do it again! Round TWO! Woo hoo! And tomorrow morning, we will repeat this process.
No, I'm not smiling during the holidays! Okay, maybe just a little......

My "Christmas" with my kids....

My children spend every Christmas with their dad and his family. Reason being? It's a "Christian holiday", I've never really done the whole Christmas thing really, I hate Christmas and it's more important to his family than it is to mine. It's not to say that my children don't get a Christmas with me though. We celebrate ours the weekend before "actual Christmas". Today is our "Christmas eve". We'll eat and play and go through our regular routine, but the next morning will bring holiday fun.... I sort of can't wait....

Blah, Christmas....

Come on. I know that I'm not the only one who's a little (or a lot) BLECH! about the holidays. I can't be the only Grinch or the only Scrooge. The only difference between them and me? I'm still going to hate the holidays. SOMEONE has to be out there. It's not just me. There are others who have expressed a certain disdain for this time of year. It's okay. I get it. I promise. No judgments shall befall you here.

Just in time for Christmas......

I may be a "BAH HUMBUG!" kind of person around the holidays, but I hate Christmas.... (Wait, what?)
Don't get me wrong. I've always donated to Toys for Tots, gave loose change to the Salvation Army,  bought stupid crap at the kids' schools' fundraisers for their pet charities.... Blah. And I will or have done those things this year too.
But this year I did something a little different because the opportunity arose. I've recently opted to shear off the locks again and go from mid back length hair to a close cropped pixie hairdo in order to donate said hair to my fave charity, Locks of Love.
I think it's a fantastic way of "giving of oneself" and considering the fact that I'm broke, I can't donate money. I figured growing out my hair and getting it cut off can be my way of giving back. If not for anything else, I'm REALLY good at growing hair.
My reasons for hating the holidays isn't about the spirit of giving or anything like that. I am really just disappointed that this doesn't follow through to the rest of the year. It seems to me that we shouldn't have a "time of year" when people are kinder or more "brotherly" to one another and yet.... Well, looking around, I see shitty people doing shitty things to others all the time.
My reasons for Locks of Love to be a favorite charity of mine is simple really. I once went through a period of having a bald spot on the top of my head courtesy of my sister and a zip top. Of course, after said incident, and the resulting ripping of hair from my head with aforementioned zip top, I was told by dear sister that if I said anything to mom and dad, she would kill me in my sleep. At the time, I was 5 or 6 and she was 16 or so. (In looking back though, even if I HAD told my parents, somehow, they would have seen fit to punish me for it and say that it MUST have been my fault somehow anyway....) Whatever.
I had to endure tests of all sorts including blood work and skin scrapings, which resulted in a bigger bald patch on the top of my head.... Kids are cruel and mean, ESPECIALLY when they notice something different about another child and can exploit it somehow. Well, for months, until the hair started to grow back, I was known as "Baldie". It sucked being ostracized like that. Funny thing is, after the hair grew back, everything was back to the way it was. Like it never happened.... For everyone else around me. It left a rather large impression on me though.
There are children who suffer from hair loss and CAN'T say, "It'll grow back..." For whatever the cause (in the cases that Locks of Love deal with, Alopecia Areata, which is what I was tested for) I can't imagine or don't want to imagine the cruelty that these children must have to endure. It sickens me as well as saddens me. Locks of Love provides disadvantaged children (more girls than boys, as you can imagine) with vacuum fitted wigs so that they can "fit in and feel normal". They deal strictly with the charitable donations (both hair and money) to make and distribute these wigs to these kids....
There have been some controversial issues brought forth against Locks of Love saying that these funds have been misappropriated, but think about the amount of money it takes to go through the making of one wig. Sure, the wig costs about $1800, but it costs money to sort the hair (as ALL the hair donated cannot be used because it's not suitable or usable hair). Think about the overhead (advertising, an office where people are sorting through the mounds of mail they get, lawyers, "staff", although most of it is volunteer, it can't ALL be).... Blah, blah, blah.... And considering, they are the ones eating most or all of these costs.... Meh.... Whatever. Dig into ANY organization/ cause/ group/ religion/ whatever, and you're bound to find one or a whole lot more skeletons in the closet...
I'll frump on about the holidays being a crappy time of the year and stuff and I will definitely bitch and complain that this time of the year screws with the feng shui of the flow of my life, but I will not have anyone say that I am without a spirit of giving especially during the holiday season because of what they are. Although I see the whole "spirit of giving and brotherly love" as something people should have all the time, I think this year, I was just in time for Christmas for a nice haircut with a purpose.

The spirit of Christmas!

Yup... Holiday shopping brings out the worst in me, but mine is more of a grumbling, inward kind of bad... It's that time of year again when out at the malls or wherever, I get to witness the wonderful-ness of the spirit of Christmas as people fight and claw their way around the stores buying up all sorts of crap for gifts. 'Tis the season...
Last year I witnessed a woman tossing a little boy out of her way to get to a pegboard of toys. This year, I'm sure we'll see more of the same type of behavior running rampant all the fuck over the place. I choose NOT to go out and braves the retail places simply because I don't know whether I'd be able to keep my head. And GOD forbid if I had my kids out and something happened to one of them... I am a mama bear. Don't touch my kids. If you do, no amount of anything is going to pry me off of you and remove my fingers from your eye sockets as I use your head like a bowling ball.

More insomnia.... YAY!

Yes, another post brought to you by insomnia. Because I CAN'T FREAKING SLEEP!!!!!
Why this time? Probably the impending holidays. I really do hate this time of year... :s

Chuck Norris facts.....

I have an obsession with Chuck Norris facts. No doubt. I don't know what it is about them that I find so amusing, but there you go. I find them and I giggle myself stupid over them. Most people know about my obsession with Chuck Norris facts as well and of course, being EVER SO AWESOME, when they find a particularly good one, they are kind enough to share them with me.
Now, for really real though? From what I understand, real life Chuck Norris is a nice guy. He's a philanthropist. He is known for his contribution towards organizations such as Funds for Kids, Veteran's Administration National Salute to Hospitalized Veterans, the United Way, and the Make-A-Wish Foundation in the form of donations as well as fund-raising activities. He's a Republican, an NRA member, a Christian, a former Air Force Air Policeman and a family man.
It just makes the Chuck Norris facts better. Just sayin'....

My life ain't so bad.....

I've often complained about my life and some of the things that happen in it. I am thankful for the many things that I DO have. I don't think I've ever been NOT grateful for them. My issues sometimes lay in dwelling (perhaps a bit too long at times) in the crap that gets heaped onto my plate. I'm working on sorting it all out. And as far as any of my "rock bottom" moments? I know it could have been a lot worse. I've always managed to crawl back out and claw my way back to where I needed to be.
Life isn't always a bowl of cherries. I get it. I'm doing what I can and doing it myself and doing it well because no one is going to do it for me. Nothing good is ever going to get handed to me. On the other side of that, just because someone is smiling at me when they hand me a bagful of dog shit doesn't mean I have to take it either. Keep moving forward.

An epic moment....

I need to take a moment and share an epic moment with you all. My holiday shopping is done and everything that I needed to have done is completed. I don't need to brave any more malls or shopping centers to look for gifts and holiday type stuff. I'm so happy, I think I'm gonna go cry or something.

It's beginning to look a lot like BLAH BLAH!!!

People are out in full force, pushing and shoving and being none too nice. Everywhere I go, it looks like Christmas threw up there. It's a nightmare. There are just so many things I hate about the holidays.
Well, first of all, Christmas has NOTHING to do with Christ, the birth of Christ or anything Christ-like. So whatever. The day is more about greed and overindulgence and maybe a couple of the seven deadly sins that are no-no-ed in the bible. Honestly.... These church going people look like such hypocrites and shame their religion on what they consider to be the holiest of days. Bite me.
People are running around all over the place trying to spend as much money that they can.... Money that they don't have. All for the satisfaction of I don't even know what. It's like a day when greed and gluttony are forgiven just because.
Maybe it is that I'm a bit Scrooge-y. Or maybe I have a valid point. Think about what the holiday is supposed to mean and think about the reality of what it is. Go to a local mall or a shopping center or something and look around. Personally, I find it to be rather frightening and I am usually MORE armed to the teeth than I normally would be simply because of the time of year...
Whatever the case, I don't like the holidays. Never really have. EXCEPT for the noms part. I love the noms part.

Christmas tree.... Sort of....

So, we got our tree.... It's not impressive by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, it much resembles the Christmas tree in the Charlie Brown Christmas special.  Don't get me wrong. Just because I hate Christmas and stuff doesn't mean I'm going to pass that whole quirk off onto my kids and deny them a Christmas with me.
So, I got them a tree. It's more like a branch or a twig, really, but none the less. They had a great time getting it all trimmed up with the ornaments and crap, had cocoa, took pictures. They had a blast. I'm not saying I like Christmas or anything, but I guess some of it isn't all bad.....

My evil plan.....

I think Jack Skellington had it right. Steal Christmas and shape it into a holiday more suitable for me... Yes. I will take this Christmas thing and mold it to become something else.... Yes..... The wheels are turning, a plot hatched..... Mwa ha ha ha ha! Yes..... YE HE HE HE HESSSSSSSSS! Minions! Go forth and bring me..... Oh, crap! That's right. I don't have any minions.... Maybe I can ask for some for Christmas.....

No more X'mas!!!!!

My X'mas issues aren't so much about the holiday itself, but the hoorah and commercialism and materialism that comes with it. I don't want to take the whole "Christmas thing" away from kids and all, but somewhere along the line I think the whole spirit of Christmas got lost. THAT'S the big problem I have.... You know what? Just wake me when it's over. Bah humbug......

December 1st....

So it begins.... We start the "Happy Holidays!" season. The retail nightmares, the rude people, the endless frustration and the fact that I hate Christmas. Pfft! Whatever! It's officially on now. I'll be hearing the holiday songs in every store I go to. Seeing tinsel and ornaments and holiday related stuff in displays everywhere. Ugh! I hate the holidays.