Monday again?

Didn't we just HAVE a Monday, like a little while ago? Why do Mondays have to come so fast? And so often? I'm just saying... Yeah... It's one of those...

Did you just threaten me? Yeah... I'm not feeling it...

It's cute or pathetic (I'm not quite sure where I stand yet) seeing the most non-menacing people trying to deliver a serious threat.
I had the school call me regarding my son's "bullying incident" at school. My boy had pointed out his attacker to a friend of his when they were walking down the hall just because he was curious to see who it was... Friend ended up spitting on attacker's jacket... Not nice. Funny... But not nice. I understand WHY friend wanted to do it, but still... So I get the call... Apparently, THAT would be considered "collusion" and that falls under the "bullying" category... Are you fucking serious?
It wasn't "collusion" when a group of boys chased my kid, tripped him with a chair, tackled him, punched him in the gut, and tossed him down a flight of stairs all while telling each other NOT to let my boy get away... But my kid telling his friend who pushed him down the stairs and said friend spitting on the the kid's jacket is collusion.
End result? Well, I wouldn't want to allow my son to be punished for bullying in their school, would I? That's the best they have? I'm supposed to say, "Oh, well gosh! I should drop this whole thing!" ... Yeah. I'm not feeling it.

Ah...

My time spent with my Lucky has been nothing short of amazing. It has nothing to do with anything but the quality of time that we've been spending with each other. It's not all about the violating the snot out of each others' personal space(although quite enjoyable), but we are finding that living, loving and laughing and being completely immersed in the moments we are together has been... Nothing short of life altering. Filling our lives with the positives instead of wallowing in the negatives especially when it comes to us moving forward and following the path of the rest of our lives has been a slow process. We still have our moments of self pity and negativity, but they are becoming so trivial. We are coming to find that instead of lamenting the things we don't have, we should be celebrating the things that we do. Instead of worrying about the people who don't matter, we have filled our lives with those who do. Instead of concentrating our energies on hating and being angry, we surround ourselves with love and laughter and life. He has his bad days and so do I, but with the love and support that we give each other and the same love and support that we are receiving from friends and family, moving forward doesn't seem so hard to do any more. How weird is that?
It's been such a strange journey, getting to this point. It took quite a bit of effort and some deep down soul searching, a painful excursion, by every definition, but I'd rather pave this new path in positives to keep moving forward than negativity.
There are so many people that I have to thank for this new realization. Some are rather unexpected really, but in seeing what I don't want to be, it makes it easier to see what I DO want to be.
I am chugging along... August 2011 is coming up fast... I've given myself a deadline to see where I'm going to be by then and regardless of what the outcome, there is plenty that I can honestly say, "You know what? Mission accomplished!" and I'm okay with that. Moving forward does feel good. :) Thanks for coming with me, Lucky! XOXOX

Huh?

There are times when I sort of listen in on conversations simply because there's nothing else to do. Sometimes, the conversations are about politics where I may agree with something someone said or they start some idiot's rant about how our president is doing a great job with his hope-y, change-y shit. Sometimes the conversations have to do with a movie or a tv show... Stuff about things in the tabloids, something in the newspapers (sometimes, it's the same difference really... Just sayin'...). It could be about anything, but regardless of what it is, CONTEXT is kind of important.
Sitting down in a dentist's office waiting room, a woman was on her cell. There really was no avoiding hearing the conversation. She was loud and right there. Great...
So her end of the conversation was something like this...
"So if you put it in and leave it there, it won't work.  If you put it in and just move it around, sometimes it works. If that doesn't work, take it out and put it in again. Just keep doing that until something different happens... You'll see what I mean!"
I guess I was looking at her all weird and she said to me, "Oh, I'm talking to my son..." 
I raised up my hands in the universal, "I don't want to know, I don't need to know..." gesture and went to see about how much longer my daughter and I were going to have to wait in the waiting room.
"Well, I'm sorry your girlfriend is getting bored... Are you doing what I'm telling you?"
I wanted to do the "plug my ears and LA-LA-LA!", at this point...
"Well, what do you mean it 'feels funny'? Get your brother to help you out with it! He knows what he's doing! He's done it hundreds of times! Or better yet, let him do it. You can watch and you'll know how to do it next time..."
I wanted to climb up a wall or just go running out of there with my daughter in tow and just never go back.
"Well, do you feel it? ...It should go in... Where are you trying to put it? ...Well, try the other one!"
I'm singing songs with my daughter at this point. Loudly AND badly... It was wrong. American Idol's worst were even offended, but it was all I could do...
I went in for the appointment before I had to hear any more. Thank GOD! I'm going to tell myself that it was something like a tv plug or a cable wire or something and KEEP telling myself that it was something benign like that... The alternative is just too disturbing...

Wii time...

The Wii is one of the coolest and most addictive thing on the face of the planet... I don't care what anyone says... It's just fun. There are certain games on the Wii that are just plain good ol' fun.
Getting up out of your  seat and playing a video game? Shyah! Great fun! We've been Wii-ing for a few years now. Just Dance had been a great one! Trying to dance like the people on the game? Good times! Nothing like getting a bunch of people together to look like idiots doing super silly dances, although we got the occasional ringer who actually DID know how to dance in the mix, screwing up the feng shui of the spazzing out the rest of us were doing...
Simple games like Wii bowling and Wii baseball and Wii carnival games? Well, surviving the winter in New England and the weather just WON'T permit one to go outside and play, I guess the next best thing is pretending to play some outdoor games... Sure it's better playing outside and running around in the sunshine and crap, but you know what? The Wii is fun.  That's right. I said it. It is FUN!
Watching the kids Guitar Hero is always great fun... Them rockin' out to tunes that I loved in my youth... It was TOTALLY amusing to see a 4 year old with a guitar/ remote kickin' ass on Walk This Way or Rock You Like a Hurricane...
The kids have learned about respecting "the clobber zone" and to stay well away from it, making them more aware of what's going on around them. And of course, we've learned the all important lesson of making sure that the straps are securely around the wrists at all times! I don't think grandma's porcelain bunny is ever going to be the same though... Oops...

Mo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-om!

The pre-teen still has moments where he seems less than pre-teen-like and more four-year-old-esque. Oh, don't get me wrong, he'll still brood and throw temper tantrums and stomp around... Wait... Four-year-olds do that too...
Anyway, he was sitting on the john the other day, lights off, door ajar... Naturally, I didn't think there was anyone in there when I went in to put the freshly laundered towels into the linen cabinet... The high pitched squeak that he emitted was funny. Then,
"Mo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-om! I'm POOPING!"
Cheese and crawl kid! Shut the door next time! And light a freakin' match, will ya?

Because I said so!

Who hasn't used this line at one point with their kids... When all else fails and logic seems to escape the child and no amount of explanation can get the understanding needed to make sure that the child understands it was their bad...
What other recourse is there?
I know that the pre-teen is going through a period in his life where he is trying to feel out his own and become a true individual, making his own rules and living his own life, but still... There are certain things that, as a parent, you still need for them to understand. First and foremost, "I am the parent and you will do as I say, ding dang it!"
Mine certainly does not understand it. He will rebel at every opportunity. I guess it's just a thing. What can I say? I will still try and remain as steady and true and try to be as constant and consistent as possible. Some day he will come to understand and maybe even appreciate the effort I put in to make sure he grows up straight and strong... Right? :)

And I though I was an idiot...

There are times when I question my own intelligence... I've done stupid things and thought back on the moment and said, "Wow! THAT was stupid!" But then there are times when I come across people that make me look like a super genius. I mean Ultimate Super Villain type super genius.
Rich, poor, cultured, uncultured, good, bad, well educated, or not... Stupidity is something that does not discriminate. Hey! Just take a look at the government officials that we have in office all across the country or stop by your local grocery store... Idiots can be anywhere.
Now, this is probably something that I give way too much thought to... (No! Not you Mia! You don't ever do that!) Yeah, yeah I do. I know that there is a certain type of hopeless futility in trying to reason out WHY people are so fuckin' stupid. There is also a certain sinking feeling that comes with the realization that these morons are everywhere. If I just stuck to finding amusement in watching the stupidity occur, I might be okay. If I gave no thought to anything other than watching, thinking, "Ha ha! That was funny!", pointed and laughed and went about my merry little way, I wouldn't be half as frustrated about the amount of stupidity in the world. Yeah... Still working on the whole "I can change myself for the better, not everyone else" thing and learning to set the proper example instead of being claimed by the stupidity that people tend to get sucked up into. I have enough on my plate and there's plenty of room in the garbage heap to scrape the unnecessary bits off of my plate to make room for the positives that I am striving for. Although I don't think I'll ever be able to NOT find amusement in the stupidity of others and the stupid things that they do. It's a thing with me...

Happy Valentine's Day!

Dearest Lucky,
Happy Valentine's day, My Sweet Puppy Guts! I love you to tiny little bits and pieces that squish! XOXOX
With love,
Your Kitten Puddles
Always

GTFO!

There are certain days when I wish I could just hire someone to follow me around just to tell people to get the fuck away from me or get the fuck out of my way.Just for a day. It would certainly save me a lot of grief and hassles as well as the frustration of having to do it myself. Then to top it off, there is a certain degree of entertainment watching someone getting told off by someone else... There was this one time where I watched someone telling himself off, but that's probably a whole different KIND of post all together. It was entertaining, amusing and disturbing all at the same time...
If I had the designated GTFO-man by my side, I could go about my business and have the frustration handled by someone else. I guess since I don't have a GTFO-man, I'll just have to do it myself. I guess there is a certain satisfaction to handling my own battles by myself. <Sigh!> Just another something I gave way too much thought to... Really.

Not a morning person...

I've been spending time in the morning before everyone else gets up as "contemplation time". It's dark and quiet and it gives me the opportunity to sort out my shit before the day begins. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather be a lazy sack sometimes and stay in bed and have the only exercise I get for the day be rolling around in the bed to find another comfortable position to fall back asleep in. It's getting a little bit easier to do mornings because I actually get to ENJOY the first cup of java instead of slugging it down between periods of chaos...
Nope, I still wouldn't consider myself a "morning person" and I doubt that I will ever become one, but I guess it doesn't have to be so bad...

Long weeks...

Seven days makes up a week... I know that... But there are weeks that seem to drag on forever and the weekend just doesn't come soon enough. This has been especially true with the rotten weather we've been getting this past winter. Never know what the day is going to bring. It makes it difficult to schedule anything for the kids and myself when the weather becomes a huge factor. Rearranging a schedule for five can be daunting when the schedule is sometimes crammed full. Then it becomes a matter of having a week where the weekend can't come soon enough AND there aren't enough hours in the day to accomplish all the things that need to be done. How does that work, you ask? I don't even know myself.
When it's all said and done and everything that needed to be accomplished for that week is done and I look back on the week, it never seems so bad. I don't get how that works either. Somehow, I get through it though and I guess that's what matters. I got the shit done.

Cheese and crawl!

Oh, the drama!
Living with a preteen is melodrama at its best. Everything is a cause for mood swings, brooding, pouting, stomping around and ultimately storming to the bedroom and slamming the door shut, then plugging into the iPod or the whatever and listen to broody, cranky preteen music and whine about the injustices of life. Good times. I've gotten a lot better at gauging the different levels of pre-teen angst and I can read the different stages of where on the brood-o-meter we are almost at any given time... I'm still waiting for the secret decoder ring and manual though... Sure could use it...

Just giggle and smile...

It's always great to be able to point out someone else's stupidity without saying a word. The giggle and smile says all. They know. You know. And both parties acknowledge that the other knows they know. Good times.
At a parking lot the other day, I was parked next to some idiot. We were both unloading the carts and putting our groceries into our cars. I couldn't fit any more into the back of my car and the cart guy was going around collecting carts. So, I closed the back door and started to push the cart towards the guy collecting the carts. The moron next to me went off on a tirade saying that I was stealing his cart and taking the rest of his groceries. I gave him the standard "WTF are you talking about?" look.
(And of course, I'm a "stupid bitch", AGAIN!) He went all, "What are you doing you stupid bitch? That's my cart! You're trying to steal all my shit! That's MY cart!"
So, I had to point behind him to where "his" cart was and say, "You mean, that one?"
I guess he forgot where he put his damn cart or I don't even know... Maybe I should have kept it at a stifled giggle... Maybe I shouldn't have pointed and howled. He knew, I knew... He went back to loading up his car, I got into mine to leave with a smile on my face... I'll take my humor and laughs where I can get them.

Aaachooo! Again...

Sneezing has proven to be dangerous for me... Especially the really big ones. The whole body sneeze that convulses everything unintentionally... The epic sneeze. Damn near knocked myself unconscious last time...
This time, I was well away from the kitchen... No counters to bang my head on... No refrigerators to crash into... The only casualty were some groceries... Or so I thought until the next morning.
Everything hurt. My back, my neck, my stomach... I don't get it. It's either that I need to work out more because I can't handle sneezing or my epic sneezes are so freakin' EPIC that they cause soreness, aches and pains... I don't know which is more sad to me right now... <Sigh...>

Monday cometh...

It's not even 5 in the morning yet and the house is still quiet so I don't count it as being Monday yet... There is still the warm and fuzzy sensation that comes with being half asleep still. Quiet, dark and there is still peace. All is still right in the world. Nothing has gone wrong yet.
This is when I take a moment to be thankful for these little moments. Then I take the time to think about all the other things I can be thankful for. It has been quite a therapeutic experience. Just taking a bit of time at the beginning and the end of the day. The beginning of the day would start with being hopeful for the things I can continue to be thankful for and hopeful that I might have something else that I might be thankful for. My kids, my Lucky, friends and family, and all the basic essentials. I take the time out to be thankful for my kids' sakes. They have both their parents that love them and we are doing our best for them. Separately, but at the end of the day, the kids know that they are loved, they feel safe and secure in knowing that we are there for them and despite OUR differences, they come first. My kids still have ALL FOUR of their grandparents and all the extended relatives.They have their friends. They are loved, safe, healthy, happy and have everything that they need. All things that I can ultimately be thankful for.
At the end of the day, its decompressing and getting rid of the "crap" the day brought and going back over and sifting through the positives.Those are things that no matter how hard anyone tries, they can't take them away from me.
Some days are better than others, but I have to admit, getting rid of the bag of bricks, even one brick at a time, has been uplifting. I'm coming along. I doubt I'll ever find "peace", but something close will do.
No worries, mind you. I'm still going to be grumpy and stupidity will still amuse the snot out of me and I'll still be as quirky as ever. I think I have a clearer view of "my path" although I'm sure I'll still be distracted by the many things that cross this path. Oh, and of course shiny things. And chickens... The lives ones... They walk around all funny... I find it amusing. It's a thing.
In the meantime, Monday approaches and thus starts another week of the usual hustle and bustle of life. <Sigh!> Hurray work! At least I have something to do! Hurray the kids will be cranky and I'm sure there will be a moment or two that they will try my patience to its limits! But they are healthy, beautiful, happy (for the most part) children and they are really the coolest kids on the face of the planet. Roof, food, clothes, warmth... All the things that we need and even a few that may not necessarily be necessities, but we can be thankful for them none the less.
Ain't too much wrong with that...
Tick... Tick... Tick... Thus ends the "It's not Monday yet" moment and Monday comes screaming forth with the annoying, ear splitting <BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!> of the stupid alarm clock. <Sigh!> Yay! Monday! Bring it on!

Lawns...

Some people get absolutely CRAZY about their lawns. I once lived in a three family house. My apartment was on the lower level. The guy next door was one of those crazy lawn guys. During the spring, summer and fall, he'd be out there mowing the lawn, watering it, be all on hands and knees weeding it... He must have spent a fortune on the maintenance and all the crap that he bought for it. I have to admit it, it looked beautiful. Green, plush... It was amazing. And NOBODY was allowed on it. EVER! If he were allowed to sit out on his front porch with a shotgun, he would have. You just don't go near his fuckin lawn. Apeshit couldn't even accurately describe what he became if you so much as touched a blade of grass in his front yard. The string of obscenities and threats... It was quite amusing.
So, lawn dude had a dog. An old, overweight beagle that barked at everything... ALL THE FRIGGIN' TIME! I don't think the dog ever shut up. Now, lawn dude, being all obsessed with his grass never allowed his dog to "go" on the lawn that he meticulously kept. He brought the dog to where "our yard" was. We asked him not to, but he denied it despite the fact that we watched him do it. "Nope, I have my own yard for the dog to do his business!"
Granted, none of us really cared too much about the lawn and if it got TOO long, one of us would mow it and that would be that. None of us really took the time to maintain the lawn or do anything beyond mow it from time to time. It was just the point.
Enter golf clubs. In the summer time, if you waited long enough, the shit would dry up in the heat and sun. In the fall, if you waited until early morning, they'd be cold enough to be solid and in the winter... Well, duh! None of the residents in "my building" had dogs so why did we have to deal with the dog shit? We made a game of it. The golf club sat out on the front porch for anyone who noticed a poo in our yard...
Lawn dude went NUTS! He hated seeing the poop on his lawn, but wouldn't confront any of us because he'd basically be admitting that he let his dog shit on our lawn. I mean why would his lawn be free of shit and ours covered with it? Even after I moved it continued. A year and a half this continued... Lawn dude continued to let the dog shit on "our" lawn and it was "golfed" back over onto his with a nine iron. He even tried to steal the golf club from the front porch... Thank goodness for the creaky second step and the squeaky screen door to the front porch! Yeah... It continued on until the dog died...
I've never really understood people getting all crazy about their lawns... I chalk it up as one of THEIR quirks... Not too much I can do about it.

The Internet...

Traversing the internet is always... Interesting. You never know what you're going to find. I mean seriously. You can type in the most random combination of words and in .09 seconds, a gojillion pages pop up  relating to the words you typed in.
I have learned quite a bit about a lot of different things. I have come across recipes, learned about different cultures, seen pictures of places that I may never be able to get to in my lifetime. I have found friends that I had lost touch with, I have found hard to come by items that you wouldn't necessarily find anywhere else. It's quite the great little tool. The world does seems a little bit smaller when it can be right there at your fingertips... An hour of your time and it's the poor man's vacation really... Fruity drink in one hand, flip flops on your feet and a goofy shirt and hat and surfing through websites about the Bahamas. Culture, food, pictures of pretty beaches... Might as well have fun with it...
But beware... There is stuff out there that will make you regret ever being born too... I mean sick, twisted shit that makes you want to gouge out your own eyes, and make you want to perform a lobotomy on yourself with a red hot poker and a claw hammer, just to erase the images that burn themselves into your mind... Harmless searches like Google-ing "cookie recipe" and you can hit the jackpot with some pretty weird shit. Cookie recipe on Google, 15-20 pages in, and things start getting less then cookie recipe like. I came across one and in the desciption was listed "chocolate chip, oatmeal, oatmeal raisin, rum, white chocolate macadamia, almond..." It listed a bunch of different kinds of cookies and qualified it with, "Best recipes ever! Award winning!" So I clicked on it...
Let's just say, what was seen can never be unseen...

Because I don't have enough to deal with...

Just when I think I have everything typed up and in order and I'm satisfied with it, I move on, but when I go back to it, I find that I make more changes and have to go back through the process all over again... I've got about  twenty chapters to finish typing up, then re-writing and editing, then going back through... Blah, blah, blah... I get calls from the publishing place from time to time... "Is it finished? When will you be able to submit your manuscript?" Despite the fact that I have another two months left before "deadline". I hate typing and I really suck at it because hunt and peck is the only method I know, some of the keys keep popping off the keyboard and get lost... Always a fun time I assure you! And of course, life is happening all at the same time.
Things are hectic and crazy, but it feels good. I've taken a hiatus from the Ebay thing and concentrating my efforts on my children and getting this book typed up and the manuscript sent out. They figure, if I meet the deadline, the book will be "on the shelves" this summer...
As if I didn't have enough on my plate, I always have to go out of my way to seek out the stupidity of others, simply because it amuses me. We've all run across that moment, either watching the news or seeing it happening right in front of you... Blatant stupidity that merits a moment of witnessing simply out of morbid curiosity. I've thought to myself plenty of time, "No fuckin' WAY that person is stupid enough to... Wow! He did it... I guess he WAS that stupid..." What's really scary is that, you never have to look very far to find stupidity. There's an abundance of it out there and it's not even a matter of knowing where to look.
It's like looking for shooting stars out in the countryside. If you look in one direction long enough, you are bound to see one... It's the same with stupid people doing stupid things. You find a likely area and just watch. It'll happen.
Some of these moments are noteworthy. Other times it would maybe merit a giggle and we move on. Some might get the face palm and the head shake of disgust. Some might get the laugh and sigh. Some might get a mere glance and "Meh! Not worth my time..." Then there are the ones where you point and laugh out loud, bust out your cell phone to take pictures and send them out to everyone in your contacts, post the picture on Facebook, write a blog about it and joke and laugh about it for years to come...<Sigh!> Quirk... What can I say? I'm keeping this one.

Groundhog Day...

Happy Groundhog Day...
With that being said, I swear on everything that I hold dear and holy, if that vermin sees his shadow and hides out for another six weeks, predicting more of this winter shit, I am going to lose my ever lovin' mind! We will be having rodent stew a la Punxsutawney Phil!

Me hibernate...

With winter being on us full force, it gets harder and harder to get out of bed. I'd much rather be snuggled in under the covers and hibernating than dealing with the snow and ice and crap, but living in New England... Well, I guess it's kind of hard to avoid the snow and the ice and the crap.I hate it!
Don't get me wrong. After the snow, the outside winter wonderland world looks beautiful, especially at night. Then reality comes screaming back with the realization that I have to shovel all that pretty looking snow off the driveway.
With the amount of snow we've gotten so far this year and the number of snow days because of it, I think my children are going to be seeing the Fourth of July fireworks from their classrooms. Its been a nightmare! We're running out of room for all the friggin' snow! There's nowhere to put it all. Now come to find out we're supposed to get hit with MORE??!?? Great...
On the other side of that, I get an extra day to hang out with the monkeys. We play, we sled, we make igloos and forts, we drink cocoa and we chill on what, otherwise, would have been just a regular day of whatever. It's sort of like a surprise holiday, so I guess it's not all bad... Dang it! Another perfectly negative rant foiled again by four rays of sunshine... <Sigh!> Fine... Maybe I like the snow a little bit.

Monday...

Some Mondays are better than others... Some Mondays are not too bad... Some Mondays are great... Some Mondays can go be somewhere else and not happen and disappear and go to hell and never ever come back ever ever again.
I guess if the weekend ended on a Monday and the work week started on a Tuesday, I'd be hating on Tuesdays... If the work week was switched with what we call the weekends, and the work week consisted of Saturday and Sunday, I'd be hating on Saturdays... I don't know. Just another random thought that I probably gave much more thought to than it deserved...

Brothers...

With four kids, life tends to get interesting sometimes. Going to the grocery store could become challenging. The three eldest being boys can be quite a handful. They are active and rambunctious and full of energy, like little ferrets hopped up on Red Bull and candy bars.
When all four of them are playing together, it's really cute to see. Ages ranging from 2 to 12... You would think they didn't have too much in common, but somehow they manage. My daughter usually gets bored and goes off to play "I'm Pwintheth Poofy Panth! Yay ME!" on her own leaving the three boys... (As a side note: Is it  wrong that I find amusement in watching my two year old, who, when watching Dora, will freak out when Swiper comes to swipe? "Do-wah! DO-WAH! IT'S THWIPER! OH MY DOSH! THWIIIIIIIIPERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! DOOOOOOOOO-WAAAAAAAAAAAH! Thwiper no thwiping! NO THWIPING!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!! He THWIPING! AAAAAAH! THWIPER, NO THWIPING! THWIPER, NO THWIPING! THWIPER, NOOOOOOOOOOOO THWIIIIIIIIIPEEEEEEEEEEEEENG!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!")
I am being reassured by Lucky's mom (having raised three boys herself) that eventually they do start to get along... Seeing Lucky with his brothers, you would think, "No... They CAN'T have fought... Ever! They must have ALWAYS gotten along!" Apparently that is NOT the case. So I am still clinging to the hope that there will come a day when I will see my sons hanging out like old pals... In the meantime, I have to go break up another spat... Apparently we have a "cootie burger with cheese touch", a "snot rag" and a "Doofus Mc Stupid" in the house...<Sigh!>

Siblings...

"Quit hittin' yourself..." or variations thereof... I get to witness something along those lines like all the friggin' time. With three boys and a girl, I get that there are going to be sibling spats and stuff. I get that they are going to tease and taunt each other and fight and torture and abuse the ever lovin' snot out of each other.
I grew up with an older sister. She was the most sadistic bitch on the face of the planet. At eleven years older than me, she had the upper hand for quite a while. I was the subject of many "science experiments" and ridicule and torture and torment for a good portion of my young life. Her idea of playing a game with me was, "I'm gonna hit you with these objects here and you're going to tell me if it hurts or not..."
The feather and the pillow were okay. So were the teddy bear and the socks. It was when we got to the rocks and the claw hammer...
My kids, for the most part, get along well and when they aren't fighting, they spend very quality time together doing whatever, whether it's sitting and watching a movie, playing outside, playing a board game, doing arts and crafts, building a fort. And some of the time, they'll camp out together and sleep in a pile on the floor like a litter of kittens... You get the idea. It's really cool. Sure they have their moments, but I suppose in the grand scheme of things, it could be a lot worse...

...Ya know?

You would think that since the pre-teen doesn't like to be grounded, that he would avoid doing the things that would get him grounded... YOU WOULD THINK!
It's not like I ask for him to perform rocket surgery or brain science. Nope. Just a little bit of cooperation... I tried to explain that to him, but of course I'm just a big dork who doesn't know anything... Goosfraba! This too shall pass...

Babies and dogs...

What is it about babies or little ones with dogs that I find to be so gosh darn cute? Is it that they're probably on the same intellectual level and can communicate with each other and understand one another because neither one of them can talk? Is it that the dog sees the child as "my puppy" and will tend to the child as such? Maybe it's just the bond that I can see between a child and their dog... I don't know. I think all children need to grow up with a dog in their lives.
My mom hates dogs. But, she's a miserable martyr complex-ed bitch. Or maybe that's the reason why she is... I don't know.

"Stupid BITCH!"

With all the words available to us in the English language (or other languages, for those of us who are multi-lingual), you would think that people could come up with something a little more original when trying to insult someone. I must get called "stupid bitch" at least ten times or so in a given month. Maybe more given the time of year it is... Whether it was because I accidentally bumped into someone, I got the parking spot before them, I almost allowed myself to get hit by their car, a kneed someone in the groin because they deserved it... Maybe it was a perceived (by them) but unintentional (on my part) slight or maybe it was because they were having a shitty day and needed to unload by verbally taking their aggression out on a stranger or not-so-stranger... Whatever. It's always the same thing. "Stupid bitch!" Really? I mean, I don't see how the mental deficiency of a female dog has anything to do with the situation... Meh... I usually shoot back with the standard, "Pfft! That's the best you can do? And you're calling ME a 'stupid bitch'?..." Seriously. There are so many other things that you can say about someone that would get the job done so much better... With a little bit of creativity, the sky's the limit here.
There's always the pointing out the obvious. Again... Meh. I'm sure that they are quite aware of the fact that they are fat or ugly or short or freakish in some way. Most people are quite sensitive about their shortcomings and will do their best to hide them instead of fix them (that is if they can be fixed at all...). As far as the creativity there? Well, there really isn't.
Confusing the offender is a great tactic, but only if the offender has the remotest bit of intelligence. It gets wasted on the less than intelligent...
Going off on a complete tirade is also pretty fun, but it's time consuming and wastes quite a bit of energy. Meh... I reserve those only for those who truly deserve it AND may be worth the time and effort.
The kindergarten, "You're a poopie head!" tactic and sticking your tongue out done in a very childishly mocking way is also quite amusing in some instances.
The "making the world stop" stare is also a great one. This is the one where you stop everything that you're doing and stare at the offender with a look of pure disdain and disgust. It requires a strong "stare down technique" because no words are used. You have to be able to make a person feel stupid with just a look.
I know that "lazy" is just something that everybody does now. I get it. And there's so little creativity in the world these days... Not too much "new". It's just the same old shit repackaged. We need to get motivated people! Who's with me? .... Hello? Aww! Never mind then! Screw you! Ya stupid bitches!

School these days...

We've come to the end of the first marking period at the kids' schools. We moved from a podunk little town to a bigger community and there is a HUGE difference in the quality of the schools.
The public school system in podunk was a nightmare. A cookie cutter, white bread, winter wonderland friggin' nightmare. I am talking about US being the token minorities of this town, kind of nightmare. The school administration and staff were not able to handle anything other than average, "normal", garden variety, cookie cutter types and it showed.
The cookie cutter faculty and administration at the schools were wretched. They all plastered on their fake smiles and patronizing natures and spewed bullshit platitudes and nothing was ever done. I started barking louder. The smiles disappeared. I started barking even louder and the patronization went away. I came at them with everything and they started getting defensive. These people were terrible.
My eldest son was the constant target for bullies. I must have stormed the school at least twice a week, EVERY WEEK to confront administrative staff regarding the bullies AND the faculty who did nothing despite the fact that my son was asking for the help.
A fine example: My boy once got chased around the playground by a group of boys armed with sticks. They eventually caught up to him and started hitting him with the sticks. My boy went to go tell on them and the response he got from the teacher was, "Get over it kid. You weren't hurt that bad..." Of course, when I went into the school to confront this teacher, she hid behind the administration and the administration allowed her to.
Fine. So be it. I went into the school and gave them their final warning. If nothing was to be done by them and they were going to sit on their thumbs, then I would do something about it. The first thing I did was tell my boy, he IS allowed to defend himself. The school convinced him that he was NOT allowed to do this. Are you kidding me? The school wasn't going to do anything AND my boy didn't have any recourse?Whatever.  I know my boy is more than capable of defending himself.
The second thing I started to do was call the police when incidents occurred at school. If the administration wasn't going to answer to me, they would HAVE to answer to the police. Not only would the school have to answer, but the parents of the children would have to come forward and answer for their children's actions as well.
Well, now, come to find out that this kind of shit happens everywhere. They call it a "no tolerance policy". A "no tolerance" policy sounds great... Put into practice? Not so much. I get how the schools are trying to make sure that the situation when it happens doesn't escalate right then and there. Understandable. On the other side of that, to not punish the instigator basically allows them to get away with their actions and let's them gear up to do it again. What of a situation like that and it escalates... What isn't tolerated is kids fighting back or defending themselves. The other thing that isn't tolerated is making the administrative staff answerable to anything.
If your child is harassed by a group of 6 or 7 kids, chased down a hall, roughed up and ultimately pushed down a flight of stairs, well, apparently, that's NOT a bullying issue and will not be handled as such. The way to go is a half assed "investigation" which is basically,
Teacher: Did you guys chase him down, rough him up and push him down the stairs?
Kids: No.
Teachers: See? CLEARLY not a case of bullying.
Then peer mediation, and a denial of the victims accusations before everything is neatly swept under the rug.
WAKE UP PEOPLE!!!!!!! Me? Uh-uh. I don't think so. I've called up the police so that THEY can do an investigation, and they can try and tangle with my Jewish cobra. My Mitchie, my best friend, my lawyer.
The only advocates that children really have in school are their parents. It's unfortunate that as parents, we can't hang out with our kids in school to make sure that things like this don't happen. We send our kids off in the morning in the hopes that they come home, unharmed, unscathed and happy. A large portion of the time, no big deal. It's that one incident that can throw you for quite a loop. And when you're met with non-cooperation by the very people who, during the school hours should be making sure that things like this don't happen, how are you supposed to deal.
I get that middle school is a tough time. A weird age, all sorts of stuff, the pre-teen whatever... I get it. As far as 12-13 year old boys? They have their moments. Mine is no different. But as far as I'm concerned, he's never done anything to these other boys that merited him getting pushed down the stairs. So now? Everyone at the school tells me that their hands are tied, yet in the meantime, my son comes home to tell me that these same boys still verbally harass him whenever they get the chance and the school's hands are still tied. A great way to get them untied? Writing letters. There are several people that they do need to answer to. The Board of Ed, the superintendent of schools, police, other outraged parents in the same boat and the public.
Holy cow! When did things get so friggin' difficult? I remember a time when it was just, someone had a problem with you, you took it outside at recess, you scuffled and done. A week later, you're sitting down for juice and cookies at the kid's house and you've become BFFs. It's either that people today, including children, are becoming much more like animals that we need to have these policies put in place or we're becoming more like animals because of them... I'm not sure which is more terrifying and we're running out of room in that hand basket there...

Prayer...

I have read the bible and done some bible study, purely out of curiosity. I'm not saying I'm not spiritual, I'm not saying I don't have faith, and I will never claim to not having ever prayed ever either.
I don't know whether what I did was considered prayer or if it was wishing out loud... Sometimes they were "heard", other times... Well, no. There's a wrong way, there's no such thing as a wrong way. The book says this, the book says that... I just don't get it.
I tend to ask a lot of questions when it comes to the whole God/ bible/ religion thing. I've really never heard a concise answer. I just hear a lot of how theirs is the correct path and list the many reasons as to why everybody else is misled. I know that until I get there, I'll never be able to subscribe to a single belief. I'll just keep chugging along with what I'm doing. If I have to answer for it later, then, I guess everybody was wrong. God is just a mean bully with issues. If this guy is as understanding as most would have you believe, I think I'm going to be okay. In the meantime, we don't see eye to eye about a lot of stuff and I am always going to ask questions and keep on demanding answers. It's just how I'm wired. For something as important "where to place my faith", I just don't think it should be done willy nilly at the first thing that sounds good...

Indifference...

There is a lot of indifference in the world. It mostly has to do with people and their selfish natures and the lack of humanity thing that is spreading like a disease. People are suffering from entitlement complexes believing full damn well that they should be able to have their cake and eat it too and who gives a shit about anybody else. "I deserve it!"
What they deserve is a swift kick in the ass and a bat upside the head. I get the indifference thing. There are some situations where one is not able to do anything, but the stresses from said situation may spur one into action anyway. A small measure of indifference and the time could be better spent on something else.
I am talking about the indifference in a situation where one can do something but won't, simply because of their selfish nature and poor character. What makes it more sad is that they show this lack of character and they giggle and point in someone else's direction while NOT doing what they SHOULD be doing.
<Sigh!> We need "Anarchy for a Day" day. I'd set a few things right...

HELP! I'm surrounded by STUPID PEOPLE! They're EVERYWHERE!

I know I post quite a bit about the stupid people I come across... In truth, if I posted about ALL the stupid people I came across, I'd have to start a whole new blog JUST about the stupid people. Seriously.
I gave this a whole lot of thought. Probably way more than it deserved. I mean, to the point where I actually started to question my own intelligence...
See, the thing of it is, these stupid people think that they are reasonably intelligent or smarter and try to pass off their stupidity as intelligence. What makes it worse is that they believe everyone around them to be the idiots, which fuels them to spew even MORE of their stupidity to prove (more to themselves) that they are not stupid. Then they have to add to it by trying to point out that they are smart and you are not using less than logical arguments. I often find that just having been in the vicinity of such stupid people lowers my I.Q. temporarily...
And trying to have a rational discussion with these people? Forget it. THAT is a lesson in futility. They lie, use dirty tactics, make excuses and blame everybody else for everything. And again, the arguments themselves make no logical sense what so ever... <Sigh!>
It's fun to mess with their tiny little minds though. Just keep throwing logical arguments  at them and watch them struggle to stay afloat by trying to fabricate counter arguments, then eventually watch them flounder around in the pool of shit they created for themselves when you start calling them out on it...
Yes, much like the lady who ran the stop sign and damn near hit my fuckin' car and had the balls to tell me she had the right of way...
1.) You sorry excuse for human intelligence, "meeting" at a three way intersection, you had a stop sign, I did not. Guess what, I have the right of way. You're an ass.
2.) If there is a car already IN the intersection, that car has the right of way and maybe you should fuckin' wait until the car is out of said intersection before trying to go peeling into the already occupied intersection. Stop beeping at me  and if you flip me the bird one more time, I'm going to get out of my car and break that finger off. You're an flaming retard.
3.) No, I am not blind. I saw I had no stop sign and also took notice that you did. Your town called looking for you. They offered me money to keep you. I declined and paid them to take you back.

To sum up: The octagonal RED SIGN you saw that says STOP, means stop. Shut the fuck up, stop beeping and keep your hand gestures to yourself. You're a waste of space and perhaps you should go crawl under a rock and die. You'd be doing the world a favor.

Don't laugh...

No... Don't.... Laugh.... Must... NOT..... LAUGH.....
I have issues with that sometimes. I KNOW that there are certain things that I shouldn't be laughing at and I do try. There are certain situations when I shouldn't laugh, but what can I say?  I find humor in the oddest places and let's just say sometimes I laugh when it's a bit... Inappropriate.
Sometimes it gets triggered by something that I saw. I once saw a lady take a pretty good digger in a parking lot. She was a rather large, hefty woman. She ended up rolling around like a pill bug and and in trying to reorient herself, she looked like a turtle on its back. She scraped up her knee pretty good, but she didn't really get hurt. I asked her if she was okay, and she said she was fine... Granted I was chuckling when I asked...
It could be something that I heard that triggers the inappropriate laughter. When in an elevator, A man and a woman were talking about a rather harrowing experience the man had about his mother ending up in the hospital after a bad heart attack. That wasn't he part I was laughing about. He said something about running around like a chicken with it's head cut off... Something about the image of a headless chicken running around.... I couldn't get out of that elevator fast enough.
I have episodes when I'm not even paying attention. I might have a random thought pop into my head that I find quite amusing and sometimes, I might start to laugh... But because it's me, it will be at the most inopportune time... Like at a funeral or something.
As much as I'd like to able to say, "It's not me!" it is. Oh well... Chalk it up to another quirk I guess... It's one I'm trying to work on, but I don't have too much faith that this one is something I'm going to be able to change...

Smile! Uh... Never mind...

Maybe this is another one of those things that I think about way too much, but it's something that always pops into my head. Is there such a thing as smiling too much or too little? I know I can be cranky sometimes and I'll sport "the puss" and my smile? Yeah... If you've been following along, you know that my smile is pretty "special"... But there are people who are constantly walking around with "the puss" on their faces... Even when they're smiling, they're not... Actually, it's kind of creepy looking when they smile, either that or gross because it's a mixture of "psychotic meltdown" meets "constipation".
Then there are these idiots that are smiling ALL THE TIME. That's kind of creepy too. I mean, no matter what's going on, they're smiling. Makes you kind of wonder what the fuck is wrong with them, like "maybe they're mom dropped them on their heads when they were babies" or "HOLY SHIT! I think this one is going to snap... Hit the deck!"
I try to make it a point to try and smile, despite the "special" quality that mine has simply because it helps to reflect what I feel on the inside. I gave this another one of those "reflective moment" things...
I am forced to live with my parents because "certain situations and events" ultimately lead to my children and I  having to have to be here. But at the end of the day, my children and I have a roof over our heads, food on the table, we are warm, we are clean, we are comfortable and  I am able to care for them the way they should be cared for  because we DO have a roof over our heads. Granted, if certain situations were to change, I'd be packed and outta here like a bat outta hell, with the kids in tow in 0.2 seconds flat, but "certain situations" won't ever change because "certain people" won't ever change their stripes, so to speak. Meh... I'm working towards my own goals. To hell with "certain people".
My children and I have our health and we are chugging forward through life. Sure, there are moments of "drama" that come up, but fortunately, they are quickly forgotten and everything and everyone moves forward. The older ones are beginning to see "manipulations" for what they are, and they have been learning the difference between moving forward and wallowing in self pity. They are learning the importance of working hard and doing things for yourself because they won't be done for you. They are learning to appreciate the value of things, the quality of people and that happiness doesn't come in a box, nor does it come from lying to yourself about who and what you are. Valuable lessons that need to be felt and seen rather than just preached.
We have the people who matter to us and the people who we matter to always close by. When the shit hits the fan, the back up is there. They are there to share the load in our woes, to celebrate with us in our triumphs and there is never a fear of rejection or harsh criticism or judgment. There is love and support and a true family spirit that we carry with us throughout our days.
We all still have our "wants" sure. Who doesn't, but as far as out needs, they are all met in spades.  We have plenty of things that we can be thankful for and smile about and despite my pessimistic nature, I know that everything will eventually work itself out.

Scary looking dogs...

I've met some pretty scary looking dogs in my time. Large ferocious looking animals... In some instances, they were in fact scary. They would have ripped your arm off and played squeak toy with your head. Then there are the ones that look ferocious, but you say "PUPPY! Who wants a tummy rub?" and the tail is wagging, the goofy doggie smile, the doggie "Play?!?" position, and bam! Right over onto the back and the paws are flopping around all over the place for the "Rub my tummy! Rub my tummy!!! Me, me, me!!! Me wants a tummy rub!"
There are so many breeds of dogs that get such a bad rap. Pitbulls and mastiffs and rotties and dobies... Some of the sweetest dogs I've met were pitbulls and mastiffs and rotties and dobies...
I'm not saying you should run up to EVERY dog and make friends. I know that it is the philosophy of THAT kind of man that "All big dogs are my friends!" (Lucky happens to be one... And it's rather strange but there hasn't been a dog he's met that DIDN'T liked him...) By all means, assess to make sure that the dog is friendly, but it is another one of those, "Don't judge a book by it's cover" thing... I'm just sayin'...

I'm not sure why...

Stolen food ALWAYS tastes better... Especially stolen food off of someone else's plate. I really can't explain it. You could be eating the same thing as the person sitting next to you or it could be simple just to get up and grab the same thing as whatever it is that someone else is eating. It's the grabbing of the nom off of someone else's plate that makes it taste good because of the special FLAVOR that gets added because it belonged to someone else. Tell me you haven't nommed off of somebody's plate and thought, "Damn! That was GOOD!". I'm not talking about nomming off the plate when someone is like, "Here, try this..." I am talking about 100% table sharking of a nommy bit off of someone's plate and nomming the ever lovin' crap out of it.
I once grabbed a chicken breast off of someone's plate, realized I couldn't shove the whole thing in my mouth and licked it to claim it as mine... Okay, fine! It was about a week ago, but still... It didn't quite work... Lucky took it back and ate it anyway. He tried to share, but in doing that, it didn't taste the same any more... I guess in some instances it doesn't work.
My dad stabbed me in the hand with a chopstick once... Not that it stopped me from trying to nom off of his plate... I became adept and fast. I thought of it as training. It helped me to become the nom nom table shark that I am today...
I'm just saying, noms are good. Noms off of somebody else's plate is nommier...

Night people...

 Fear not the night.
Fear that which walks the night.
And *I* am that which walks the night.

But only evil need fear me …
and gentle souls sleep safe in their beds… 
because I walk the night. 

By Dave Grossman 

Lucky is a midnight shift cop... He spends a good portion of his life in the dark... The definition of "butt white" came from someone having seen his ass. It is so white, it's blue. He sleeps during the day and lurks around the shadows at night... Much like a vampire. When he HAS to be traversing the sunlit world, he always wears the dark sunglasses and whines about how bright it is...
But when the shit hits the fan during the scary, scary night, this is a man who will rush into a house filled with smoke to rescue puppies. This is a man who will trek through the woods on foot, in the dark for many miles in search of a missing person. This is a man who will respond to all sorts of horrific accidents and incidents... Rain, snow, humidity, cold, whatever...It doesn't matter. He says it's just a job, but I know that if it truly were, there wouldn't be the passion and effort he shows in doing the job. Another reason of the multitudes that I love him and I am VERY proud to be able to say, "Yeah. I'm HIS girl!" every day.
Regardless of how you feel about them, Firefighters, EMTs, Paramedics and police officers work the streets night and day to keep people safe. They miss their families to take care of yours. In 2010, there were 85 firefighters, 39 EMTs and 160 Police Officers killed in the line of duty. If you are a firefighter, emt, paramedic, police officer, Thank you. If you love one, or appreciate one, or know one or even just see one, just take a moment to thank them.

He's stupid, but he means well...

This story involves Otis, a baby and the UPS guy...
When my middle son was born and he came home from the hospital, Otis would not leave his side. If the baby was in the bouncy seat, Otis was right there. If the baby was in the bassinet, Otis was right there. If the baby was in the carrier, Otis was right there. If the baby was on the floor all lump like, Otis was right there. Otis was absolutely fascinated by the baby. To him, THAT was his. If the baby so much as made a squeak, Otis was running around like an idiot, making sure that the baby was okay. Diaper changes were supervised by him, feedings, naps, you name it.
When my son was about two months old, we were visiting with my parents. He was being all lump like on a big blanket on the floor of the TV room and Otis was on the blanket next to him. The doorbell rang. Quick as a flash, Otis was at the door. When I went to open it, there was the UPS guy doing his UPS thing, delivering packages and there was Otis, hackles raised barking away like a raving lunatic dog from hell. He ran back into the TV room and came back a few seconds later to resume his barkity barking. He repeated this process a couple more times as I signed for the package and apologized to the UPS guy. With the package put into the kitchen, I went to check on my son...
Entering the room, I saw quite a sight... Otis was peeing on the baby. Yuck! He had marked the whole perimeter of the blanket and then the baby himself. Then he lay down right next to my son, satisfied that he had done his job. I couldn't bring myself to yell at the dog... Everything was thrown into the wash, the baby got a thorough bath... Twice and Otis got a cookie. What was I going to do? He was just protecting "his puppy" from the evil UPS menace...

How to confuse a baby and their revenge...

Is this a universal game or what? Beeping or Booping or Honking the nose... It confuses the ever lovin' crap out of a small baby. It's kinda funny to see their reaction... Their eyes go all wonky because they're trying to follow where your finger is going and as they are trying to process that, BOOP! The nose gets touched and then they're trying to process that... You laugh yourself stupid over it and the game continues. That is until...
There does come a day when laughter becomes a trigger for the little ones too. They start to find amusement in things. Eventually, they get enough coordination to be able to touch your face and you think "Aww! How CUTE!" That's when BAM! you get a baby fist right in the CORNEA! You're going "OW! (#^$%(@&^$(&^! OW! That hurt! Oo, ow, owie, ow, ow!" Once the initial pain subsides, you will come to see that this time, it's the baby laughing him or herself stupid...

Cue Music!

Some things in life deserve to have their own theme music. C'mon. We've all done it! Something's going on and all of a sudden you feel the music... The theme song that somehow defines that moment. I am not talking about the stupid song that gets stuck in your head. (Currently, mine is "Turning Japanese"... Again. Go figure...)
Perfect example: Won the game! (We are the Champions -Queen) and who hasn't "Dun dun Dun dah, dun dun dun dah"-ed the Mission Impossible theme song when doing something they shouldn't be at least once in their lives?
Life can have it's moments where, I think, they deserve a theme song. Certain moments in my life have their own songs. Certain people have their own songs. I'm not saying that I have a constant soundtrack going on in my head, but there are times when the little people in the control tower area of my brain go through the iPod and cue a song that fits the moment... Sometimes, they're spot on. There have been times when... Well... Not so much. Which is probably a reason why I giggle at inappropriate times every once in a while.
Life is short and it's only going to be as interesting as you're going to make it for yourself... Yeah, I know. Mia's quirk #126. Theme songs.

The reason kids are so friggin' cute...

It's hard to stay angry at a child. The sad, "I'm sorry" face is the reason why. It's the reason why kids seem so friggin' cute when you're trying to be mad at them. It's a survival mechanism... Imagine some of the things they do... Then imagine if they were ugly, hateful little creatures with misshapen heads and features... Probably wouldn't go over as well.
I just survived through a 35 minute temper tantrum thrown by a very angry little two year old because I wouldn't let her eat the giant candy bar that she found. I told her that it was close to supper time and that if she did well, she could have a piece for dessert. She did not agree with me. Her shrill cries were probably heard throughout a five mile radius and I'm sure that we will be reading in the local paper about a bizarre incident where bats were flying into walls and windows, dogs were howling, cats were going crazy and local wildlife of all sorts were running amok in the streets trying to get away from some kind of "invisible predator" in droves.
When she was done with the screaming, I pulled out the ear plugs and sat with her on the bed. I was going to read her the riot act about behavior, but after looking at the tear stained face and the big, sad puppy dog eyes, I went with, "Don't do that again..." and gave her a hug. She fell asleep for a short while, a little 15 minute nap just to recharge, and lo and behold, she was my sweet little angel again.
I guess it does help that kids are cute, otherwise, I guess the species wouldn't have survived...

TV Time...

There's only two televisions in the house that are hooked up to cable. This poses a problem when there are seven people living under the same roof ranging in age from two to like I don't know... My dad has to be, like, 200 or something... Naturally, this poses a problem. We have different people with different "TV needs"... The TV room TV is the only one set up with satellite for Japanese television and pop usually wins out when claiming that it's his TV time... The scramble to the kitchen to see who gets the remote first (because it's never in the same place EVER...) to determine who will pick what everyone is watching.
Now, thankfully, there are TV's in the kids' rooms equipped with DVD players, but there are times when there's something on TV that someone HAS to watch or they'll be the only person in school who DIDN'T watch it and it's worse than the whole "cheese touch" thing... (Still have no idea what the "cheese touch" is...) Really? I remember when we didn't have access to cartoon all the time and we played outside and ran around and played with rocks and cardboard boxes.
I limit the amount of TV time they get because it turns then into little boob tube zombies. You know, the blank stares, their inattentive natures, the slack jawed, couch slouch, mini blobs. But there are times when it HAS to be TV time. Fine, I get that too. It's when they ALL want something different that it poses a problem, which is more often than not. Whatever...
They're starting to come around on the whole, not needing the TV thing. Sure they still watch your occasional cartoon and all, but in trying to curb the amount of TV they watch, it's been a slow process, but it's getting better. I want them to know that experiencing life is far better than just watching "life" (real or fake)happening on the TV. Besides, there's no way we're gonna be able to wrangle the remote away from  the old coot anyway...

Happy New Years!!!!

2011 is the year of the rabbit or so I'm told... Whatever... Happy New Years, everybunneh! See my bunnehs? Aren't they cute?

New Year's Eve...

Hhhhappy new yearsh baby! Gimme  kish!

New Years is one of the holidays that I get with the kids. It's one of "my" holidays. Bigger deal in Japan. It's like the "Christmas" of Japanese people without the Christ thing, or the tree, or the Santa thing... Okay, so it's not the same, but it's a big friggin' deal, okay?
This is all fine and well. So, because I have the kids with me, I don't go out. Lucky and Mitchie end up hangin' with me and we whoop it up and have a grand ol' time. Of course, we weighed the ins and outs about it. At the house, we are warm, safe, don't need to go anywhere, don't need to do anything, no drunken people to deal with and none of the strangers trying to hug on you and paw at you and trying to kiss you at midnight. We sometimes have surprise guests that'll stop by and say hello, which is always great, but generally it's just the three of us chillin' out and hanging and enjoying doing just that. All good. The next day is all about the food as it is a big food holiday for the Japanese and more festivities take place. Again, all good.
So, here we are again this year, waiting for "next year". Me, Lucky and Mitchie, we'll be sittin' and chillin' and doin' our thing and we'll be wishing you all a safe New Years eve from on the "couch of doom". Be safe, drive carefully and we hope not to hear about any drunk driving incidents... Because eventually, we do find out about them... Happy New Years Eve one and all!

That's right! I'm grumpy!

You can't stop me either! I don't have the kids since this is "their dad's holiday" and they spend the time with him and his family, so there really isn't too much stopping me from gettin' my grump on and staying that way. A perfectly terrible mood that can't be spoiled. I am free to be all grumpy and frumpy and NO ONE CAN STOP ME!!!! MWA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!

And then my Lucky calls to tell me that he loves me. He tells me that he needs me. He tells me that he's so glad that I'm his girl. He tells me that he misses me and that he can't wait to just give me a big hug. He tells me that he is the luckiest man in the universe for having me in his life....
Great... Nix the whole "Having my grump on" plans for the day... I'm gonna go sit and giggle like a bubble-headed teenager in the corner for a while...

Elbow gremlins and other such ailments...

As I type this now, I am being harassed by the elbow gremlin... Sure, it's just a joint pain and all, but sometimes I like to think (way too much) about what causes the pain. I know that it's just years of abuse on the body over the course of my younger days (sports, falling, fights, tripping and falling, running, tripping, falling and being an all around general spaz... And there was that one time when I walked right into a wall...)  that led to the aches and pains that I get from time to time, especially when the weather changes. (Humidity and high pressure are the worst... ) Not amusing. Call it Mia's quirk # 316. I like to think more along the lines of "elbow gremlins", "shoulder trolls", "wrist gnomes", the ever annoying "knee goblin", and the chronic, migraine inducing "brain leprechaun"... I imagine them doing a little jig with spiked shoes or using rusty hammers and drills to cause the pain, maybe chewing and biting with gnarled teeth... Yeah, I know... Shut up! I know!

My pre-teen....

Being the oldest of four HAS to be tough... You're basically the "parental science experiment" for any and all siblings who follow. Parents don't get the instruction manuals and decoder rings.  They "wing it", go by instinct, and do the best they can. Being a little more aware of what to expect on the next rounds, makes it easier... (Although once you think you have it figured out, nature throws you a COMPLETE curve ball and the next child is something COMPLETELY different in every way possible. I'm not talking about a little. I am talking "Are you sure you two are even related?" different, but that is a different post all together...)
Then to top it off, there are examples to be set, expectations of being "the leader", the responsibility of helping to care for the younger siblings, and having gone from only child to not... The subsequent children don't know what it's like to be a lone child. They come into the world having to share time and, well, everything, whereas, the eldest... Maybe not so much.
I try to keep this in mind when dealing with my pre-teen. He has not one, not two, but THREE younger siblings to contend with, and since they all have such strong and dominant personalities... Well, it gets interesting.
I'm the baby of the family, so I can't necessarily relate. Lucky helps out quite a bit in that arena being the eldest of three brothers and he is constantly trying to remind me of the position that my oldest is in when he is being "difficult". In looking at the situation, I guess I can honestly say that maybe perhaps there are times when I do expect a lot from him. Not because I am demanding that he do more than his share or make him do something well above what he's capable of, but in trying to look at it from his point of view, in comparison, it can seem like I ask him to do more than his brothers and sister.
Then there is the fact that there are four of them.... It's not always quiet, it's not always, civil, it's not always peaceful and in the grand scheme, it's not always fair. And what makes it "not fair" is having to hear, "because you're the oldest" or "because he/ she's younger than you".  It's the blanket response to "Why is it okay for HIM/ HER to   eat cookies on the floor/ play with my stuff without asking/ hit me, but I can't hit back... The list can go on. And in all honesty, he does put up with quite a bit. He does have a very high threshold and tolerance for putting up with his younger siblings (especially his sister whom he has a soft spot for) and as far as the role of big brother, he is awesome at it. Better than most.

I hate EVERYTHING!

I feel this way at least once a day. Whether it was because I caught a little snippet in the news about yet ANOTHER atrocity committed by one human being on another, maybe I saw something while being out and about that made me shake my head and realize how shitty people are, maybe I burnt my toast... It really depends on the time of day it occurs, the time of month it occurs and whether something hasn't already pissed me off BEFORE the feeling came about. I wallow in it for about ten minutes or so, but because there is usually someone who needs something, I can't "enjoy" the wallowing for too long. Besides, it makes it kind of difficult to wallow in the dark universal hate of everything when there are four little monkeys who are my rays of sunshine and smiling and being all cute and happy and stuff... Gosh darn it! They ALWAYS have to ruin a perfectly rotten mood. If you met them, you'd understand. It's kinda cool.

Merry !*%#&$*!&%#$ Christmas...

Yeah... Whatever. Pass the leftover noms...

Christmas eve AGAIN?

Well, I survived this far... It's almost over. The end of the year is fast approaching and we'll be done with all the Christmas stuff soon... In the meantime, can someone please pass the mushy taters... And the nog... And some pie... Ooh! And is that stuffing? Turkey? Yes, please. Ham too! Nom, nom, nom, nom... :(   Om, nom, nom, nom...    :/     Nom, nom, nom, nom...  Mmm...Mmmm.... Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom...   :)   Om, nom, nom... OM, nom, nom, nom....   :D     NO! That was not a smile... I still hate the holidays... A little... Pass the bread?

For Pete's sake! That's NOT what I SAID!

So, the pre-teen still insists that it is NOT his girlfriend, they  are just friends. They don't go on dates, they just hang out. And it's not a kiss, it's a peck on the lips... What??!??
"Alright-y there chicken little, peck what and who the what the heck now?If lips are meetin' lips, it's a kiss. I'm just sayin'... "
I'm not saying that I make sense all the time, but this pre-teen logic? Umm.... Yeah, I'm still waiting for my super secret special pre-teen decoder ring... He responds by throwing his hands up in the air and while stomping away, he shouts out, "For Pete's sake! That's NOT what I SAID!"
Not surprisingly, I'm the super dorks of all dorks, the ruler and ultimate undisputed heavyweight champion of all things dork and now, apparently, I'm a jerk too.
What brought the most recent episode on, you ask... I had asked him whether he got a gift for his friend, the girl (I never said girlfriend) and what he wanted for supper...I don't know how we go from, "Did you get her a gift? Oh and by the way, what do you want for supper?" To, "We're friends, we hang out, I give her a PECK on the lips..." Then all of a sudden, it's drama and brooding...
I went upstairs to talk to him a few minutes later and asked him what the deal was... Get this. I forgot to buy the little packets of he Lorna Doone cookies when I went grocery shopping. Apparently, THAT'S what he wanted for snack, but they weren't there and a cow because a vest has no sleeves...
Any day now... I know the "Living with a Pre-teen" manual and instruction guide will be in the mail...

People...

I don't like most strangers. I would sooner tell them to go away and not come back, EVER. Think about the world we live in for a second..... It's hard for me to grasp the concept of truly evil people. I'm not talking stealing candy from babies evil. I am talking baby touchers, murderers, rapists, Hitler, Kim Jung Il friggin' evil. I mean, are they born that way? Do they grow up that way? Are they made? Or is it when the mommy and the daddy do the hokey pokey and make babies something happens in the chemical make up when the cells meet... There are so many horrific things that people do to one another. Constant news reports about someone doing something to someone else that makes your skin crawl.
Some say it's in the astrological make up and the stars' and planets' alignments, other will claim it's genetics... Chemical imbalance, abuse, witness to something horrific, psychological disorder... Whatever. Whatever the case is, it's terrifying. When you look down into the face of a tiny squishy little baby, do you think to yourself, "That's the face of a serial killer right there!" or "Yeah, I can see this little one committing genocide! It'll be awesome!"  No. You think sunshine and rainbows and happy little unicorns prancing in the woods. But at some point in their lives, ALL of these sick psychopaths were tiny squishy little babies.
What if you were told, "We've seen this child's future and he/ she grows up to be the sickest kind of sociopathic, dog kicking, child abusing, mass murdering, baby touching, panda raping mother fucker on the face of the planet!" What happens then? I bring this up because at the rate things are going right now, many years from now, the government may well do the "baby screenings" to see whether a child is fit to be allowed to grow up. Improbable you say?
Just think about what's been going on over the last couple of decades, even over the last couple of years and how many things are being overrun with "bad politics" and being covered by amended laws to blanket and "protect" everyone. See where I'm going with this?
Is it because the people are getting worse that's why the world is changing or is the world changing the people... Hell in a hand basket... I'm just sayin'...

Kids and boredom....

Kids and boredom is not always a good combination. Depending on HOW bored they are and cranky, tired, or whatever, it could go from boring day to hell on Earth within a matter of minutes. A volatile situation can occur from the combination of kids and boredom.
But then there are times when kids and boredom can make for something great. That's when they come up with the best "stories".
It usually starts off with, "Mooooooooom! We're bored, we can't go outside 'cause it's gross out and there's nothing to do!"
My usual response is to suggest a list of things... The usual suspects, a game? No. Arts and crafts? No. A movie? No. Book? No. Nap? No. Snack? N.... Maybe... Okay, then what?
"Can we build a fort/ tent/ castle/ town in one of our rooms?"
What I hear is "We're gonna make a friggin' mess in our rooms and it'll spill out and mess up the whole house and the whole house will require being cleaned up! It'll be awesome!"
But, after a pause, "Fine..."  and a sigh.
"Yay!"
The mess that gets created is far better than the insanity that could ensue should they be left together, bored with nothing to do or thinking of something to do. So, I let them have at it. After an hour or so of "prep work and building" he fun begins and they never fail to deliver some great story lines...
Yeah, my kids rock... It's okay to be jealous. I would be too.

Pre-Holiday Hurrah!

I know that sometimes, even I have to say that my kids can be a pain in the ass. The screaming, the whining, the bitching, the complaining, the not listening, the not doing as they are asked, the fighting, the run around like animals, the... Well, you get the idea. It's all good. They are "spirited" individuals and they are healthy. It's what I keep chanting through grit teeth.
This weekend was something a little different. We started with a dinner out with Lucky and I and all six kids along with my mom and dad. Back to the folks' house for some present opening, finish the night off with just sitting back, relaxing and chillin' with the kids... The next morning brought "Christmas" for my kids. Randy, our magical Christmas L.P. did his best and hid all the presents around the house like they were Easter eggs. (Apparently, he's not only vertically challenged, but he lacks intelligence too... ) He comes in Santa's stead because the big fat slave driver of L.P.'s, touch-er of babies, molester of reindeer and king of overindulgence is busy cracking the whip getting all the presents ready for the following week.
Then we spent two days filled with cocoa and Christmas movies and snuggling in on the bed and giggling and laughing and playing... No issues, no problems, no fighting, no insanity. Hanging out all together and having a good ol' time. Now THAT'S how holiday is done!

Stupid puzzle games....

I am all for buying those puzzle type games for the kids. It helps them to develop patience and uses the gray lumps in their skulls for something other than processing commercials for more crappy plastic toys that they want or remembering stats and data of all the Pokemons or Bakugans ever created... (But I still don't get WHY they can't remember to put the toilet seat down!!!!!!!)
With that being said, we have a few of the puzzle games lying around. The metal ones where you have to take the linked pieces and take them apart, the Rubik's cube, the plastic doojie things that you have to get all the balls to go somewhere or do something, the other plastic doojie things that you have to figure out how to make the things do what the instructions tell you to do... You've seen them. They've either already been mastered by the boys or rendered as something that they'll conquer later and they lay in the community toy box down stairs... I made the mistake of picking one of them up and giving it a try...
After about 20 minutes, I think I may have ruptured something... Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad..... My mom walked into the room with me yelling at the toy asking if I was alright. I gave her the thing and stormed upstairs.
I went back downstairs to make myself a cup of tea about 30 minutes later. Lo and behold, woman was on the couch, frazzled and on the verge of having an eye pop out of her head, trying to figure out the stupid puzzle thing. I shook my head and went back upstairs...
When the kids got back from their weekend with their dad, the puzzle had been left out on the counter... Unsolved. Oldest boy child looks at it and says, "Oh!" and within a few seconds, the one thingy became two thingies. I looked at my mom, who looked at me. Double sigh.
It was time for dessert, then bath and bed anyway... Stupid puzzles...